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you only live once

@andre0mt

FREE, bookaholic, cancer, rock
“Life is short, live it. Love is rare, grab it. Anger is bad, dump it. Fear is awful, face it. Memories are sweet, cherish it.”

— Allcupation

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I think about the night we ended. I think about the drop in my stomach, the deleting of pictures, the tears streaming down my face, but I always think about what you did that night. Did you cry? Or did you feel relieved? That night was the most painful night of my life but it was probably just a normal one for you.
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I’m scare. Actually, no I’m terrified because I know that one day you’re going to wake up and not love me anymore, you’re going to get tired of my craziness and constant need for reassurance. You’re going to get fed up with my mood swings and my random waves of sadness. You’re going to see me how I see myself, and that’s terrifying.
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“I hate how he calls me pretty and I forget everything he has ever done to me.”
keira vanderkolk
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“I’m worried that nothing else will ever feel like love again after you.”

- Truth is I'm terrified

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That feeling in your stomach when you realize it’s really over. Your heart just sinks in all the memories, the late-night calls, and all the promises you guys made but you know what’s the worst part? Is that you don’t know if you can do it again.
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In a weird place where I’m not waiting around for you anymore but if we were given the opportunity to try again with the healed version of ourselves I would take it.
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I guess…I just thought eventually he’d choose me, so I continuously chose him.
But he didn’t.