So Crazy far from love
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There wasn’t much between us. we didn’t create many memories together but I know we were perfectly capable. we had so much potential. We were two friends that spoke to each other like lovers because we were damn scared to love. Our lust for each other was like fire, and maybe that’s why it burnt out so quick. It had been a secret compulsion we both had been thinking about for the longest time. The secret urge. A force drawing us together. We fought it off because we knew we’d be dead if they found out. Romeo and Juliet. Only more dumb and ruthless. Romeo, O Romeo, wherefore art thou, Romeo? Using me for your own self pleasure or perhaps self destruction. Perhaps both. In time, sin and temptation got the best of us. Somehow evil got romanticized in the midst of it all. It felt so electrifying. My every sense captivated by you. However, the secret scandals and toxic love abruptly clashed with reality and was put to death. You know what kind of family I come from. But I let you be my savior for a few nights. call me sacrilegious. Take me back to church. Let me say 3 hail Marys. What have you done to me? Father forgive me. Lead me not into temptation but deliver me from evil. Who are you? One minute your eyes are filled with innocence and virtue. Next it’s lies and betrayal. There’s a mighty price to pay for breathless nights with lips exploring skin. Skin on skin, saying your name 3 times in a row, and waves of unexpected pleasures come with tolls and punishments; and not the fun kind. I was deceived because what was going on between us was sweet like sugar but I forgot how easily it crumbles and comes crashing down. Doesn’t get much worse than this. When did you learn to talk like that? It’s like you breathe and consume lust…. or the lust consumes you. “Tell me about your most fucked up fantasy” you said. “This will all be worth it” you said “I care about you” you said. Liar. If you cared it would matter to you if I was hurt. Say it again. Say it again. It would matter. For I have sinned against my Lord and it was never worth it with you. Holy Mary, mother of God, pray for us sinners. Now and at the hour of our death. Amen.
Love. Love. Love.
