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psych-facts
I don’t think any of us can speak frankly about pain until we are no longer enduring it.
Arthur Golden (via psych-facts)
blastedheath
Raymond Pettibon (American, b. 1957), Untitled, 1987. Ink and watercolor on paper, 17 x 14 in.
I never really believe in those people whose having all-positive, happy-go-lucky, oh-what-a-beautiful-life-i-have attitude towards motherhood. I mean, i'm not that miserable either, but i'm not having that beautiful, sugar-covered reality show life. I'm still digging for some patience and happiness and sanity, but right now i believe i'm heading to right direction and i'm enjoying the whole process. And still, i always wondering if those "oh look at me i'm so happy! My children are perfect! My husband is romantic!" attitude is either fake, or simply gratitude, or self convincing, or some people are just like that, and i'm the bitter one. Because i personally think that you don't really have to tell everyone that your life is good, if your life is THAT good. (It's motherhood, we're all trying here :p)
As long as you are living under your parents roof, you will live by their expectations of what a good daughter is supposed to be.
Then they marry you off. You will compromise with your husband’s expectations about what a good wife is supposed to be. Perhaps even your inlaw’s expectations about...
There always seems to be something upsetting you. You should relax more. It’s not that there’ s nothing coming to get you, there’s everything coming to get you…but relax anyway, just on principle. Just lie down and look up at the ceiling – a ceiling on which you can see nothing skittering, even though there is something skittering, there are so many skittering creatures on your ceiling, but forget that.
Lie down and look up at the ceiling and breathe with those curiously fragile lungs of yours and remind yourself: Don’t worry. Don’t worry. All is as it was meant to be. It was meant to be lonely and terrifying and unfair and heaving. Don’t worry.
Welcome to Night Vale
Episode 31.5 - Condos
(via arabellesicardi)
psych-facts
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My god, do you learn.
C. S. Lewis (via psych-facts)
#motherhood #haha
The people should not be afraid of their government. The
government should be afraid of their people.
Holy fucking shit is this relevant.
soul-assassins
This needs 1 million notes
bongmeblazer
Reblog this every fucking time I see it
I went on amazon and bought all the top books on baby sleep and development. I read through them all, as well as several blogs and sleep websites. I gathered lots of advice.
You shouldn’t sleep train at all, before a year, before 6 months, or before 4 months, but if you wait too late, your baby will never be able to sleep without you. College-aged children never need to be nursed, rocked, helped to sleep, so don’t worry about any bad habits. Nursing, rocking, singing, swaddling, etc to sleep are all bad habits and should be stopped immediately. White noise will help them fall asleep. White noise, heartbeart sounds, etc, don’t work. Naps should only be taken in the bed, never in a swing, carseat, stroller, or when worn. Letting them sleep in the carseat or swing will damage their skulls. If your baby has trouble falling asleep in the bed, put them in a swing, carseat, stroller, or wear them.
Put the baby in a nursery, bed in your room, in your bed. Cosleeping is the best way to get sleep, except that it can kill your baby, so never, ever do it. If your baby doesn’t die, you will need to bedshare until college.
Use the same cues as night: cut lights, keep the house quiet and still. Differentiate naps from nightly sleep by leaving the lights on and making a regular amount of noise. Keep the room warm, but not too warm. Swaddle the baby tightly, but not too tightly. Put them on their back to sleep, but don’t let them be on their backs too long or they will be developmentally delayed. Give them a pacifier to reduce SIDS. Be careful about pacifiers because they can cause nursing problems and stop your baby from sleeping soundly. If your baby sleeps too soundly, they’ll die of SIDS.
Don’t let your baby sleep too long, except when they’ve been napping too much, then you should wake them. Never wake a sleeping baby. Any baby problem can be solved by putting them to bed earlier, even if they are waking up too early. If your baby wakes up too early, put them to bed later or cut out a nap. Don’t let them nap after 5 pm. Sleep begets sleep, so try to get your child to sleep as much as possible. Put the baby to bed awake but drowsy. Don’t wake the baby if it fell asleep while nursing.
You should start a routine and keep track of everything. Not just when they sleep and how long, but how long it has been between sleep, how many naps they’ve had per day, and what you were doing before they slept. Have a set time per day that you put them to bed. Don’t watch the clock. Put them on a schedule. Scheduling will make your life impossible because they will constantly be thrown off of it and you will become a prisoner in your home.
Using CIO will make them think they’ve been abandoned and will be eaten by a lion shortly. It also causes brain damage. Not getting enough sleep will cause behavior and mental problems, so be sure to put them to sleep by any means necessary, especially CIO, which is the most effective form. Extinction CIO is cruel beyond belief and the only thing that truly works because parents are a distraction. The Sleep Lady Shuffle and Ferber method are really CIO in disguise or Controlled Crying and so much better than Extinction. All three of these will prevent your child from ever bonding with you in a healthy way. Bedsharing and gentler forms of settling will cause your child to become too dependent on you.
Topping the baby off before bed will help prevent night wakings. When babies wake at night, it isn’t because they are hungry. If the baby wants to nurse to sleep, press on the baby’s chin to close its mouth. Don’t stop the baby from nursing when asleep because that doesn’t cause a bad habit. Be wary of night feeds. If you respond too quickly with food or comfort, your baby is manipulating you. Babies can’t manipulate. Babies older than six months can manipulate.
Sleep when the baby sleeps. Clean when the baby cleans. Don’t worry. Stress causes your baby stress and a stressed baby won’t sleep.
A cookie a day keeps the doctor away… At least, that’s what we’re telling ourselves.
Read more: How to Make Digestive Biscuits on Food52.
meowm-blogm-deactivated20230308
Have kids they said.
It’ll be fun they said.
Mothering is sometimes the loneliest job around, but it shouldn’t be.
Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth (Ina May Gaskin), chapter 9 on postpartum depression (via sassandsmiles)
“My wife got sick. She was constantly nervous because of problems at work, personal life, her failures and children. She lost 30 pounds and weighted about 90 pounds. She got very skinny and was constantly crying. She was not a happy woman. She had suffered from continuing headaches, heart pain and jammed nerves in her back and ribs. She did not sleep well, falling asleep only in the mornings and got tired very quickly during the day. Our relationship was on the verge of a break up. Her beauty was leaving her somewhere, she had bags under her eyes, and she stopped taking care of herself. She refused to shoot the films and rejected any role. I lost hope and thought that we’ll get divorced soon… But then I decided to act. After all I’ve got the most beautiful woman on earth. She is the idol of more than half of men and women on earth, and I was the one allowed to fall asleep next to her. I began to shower her with flowers, kisses and compliments. I surprised and pleased her every minute i could. I gave her a lot of gifts and i lived just for her. I spoke in public only about her. I incorporated all themes in her direction. I praised her in front of her own and our mutual friends. You won’t believe it, but she blossomed. She became better. She gained weight, was no longer nervous and loved me even more than ever. I had no clue that she could love that much. And then I realized one thing: the woman is the reflection of her man.” ~ Brad Pitt about Angelina Jolie
Hell yes.