hey

Best birthday photo

get you a man who can do both

one of my patients came in for an emergency visit, because she snapped the wire on her retainer watching the movie when MBJ took his shirt off she clenched her teeth so fucking hard she snapped it. that is the fucking funniest shit ever to me this tiny 17 year old girl thirsting so goddamn hard she busted steel

Y'all, it gets better. She found out.

We interviewed her, obviously.

update:

Such a developing story.

I love this story

This was a wild ride from start to finish

I know I say this a lot, But this is one of the best things on this website

Sophia is currently doing great in college, and I still get about one kid a month in the office who asked if this really happened.

I found it!! The original post!!

A little PSA about ASL for ‘Thank you’! I’ve had all of these signed to me accidentally hahaha. And whenever I sign thank you to non signers, sometimes they thought I was blowing a kiss to them. T_T ✩ Twitter ✩ Tapastic ✩ Facebook ✩ Patreon ✩

THANK YOU KIND OP

Oh my god.

Your daily dose of cat memes

nowadays so many tumblr posts are just about tumblr. we're running out of things to talk about...

I switched my trashcan with my neighbor's today because theirs is nicer

YOU

Jejejjeje I saw this in tiktok and wanted to draw this

Almighty optical illusion

Keanu Reves's eyes follow you wherever you go

PS2 Graphics Jesus isn’t real... He can’t hurt you...

getting absolutely humiliated on tumblr dot com

I store them in the fridge like a sane person because I live in the US and commercially sold eggs in the US go through a washing and sanitatization process that removes something from the shell called the cuticle which is what stops harmful bacteria from getting inside. Therefore, in order to protect from the development of bacteria, including salmonella, commercially sold eggs in the US need to stay refrigerated to be safe.

If you collect your own eggs, buy from someone who doesn't go through the wash-and-sanitize, or live in... most other countries, then you're good to store your eggs out of the fridge. But seriously if you're in the US buying at the grocery store, KEEP YOUR EGGS IN THE FRIDGE.

Will you treat him gently with his bread soft carapace...? (...)

THIS ONES FOR AMELIA

The next time you've got a friend over, set an example and put your phone on the table, visibly there but not too far away, to let them know that you're intentionally present, not distracted, your attention is undivided and you want to be fully focused on being right there to spend time with them. Don't mention it or draw attention to this, you're not doing this to be preachy or wanting praise, you just want to be a good friend and you value your friend's time. Ideally, your friend will either notice this or even pick it up without conscious notice, and set their own phone aside on the table as well.

Then, when your friend takes a minute to go to the bathroom, grab your phone and take a photo of your friend's phone sitting on your table. Do not touch it, and put your own phone back exactly where it was immediately once you've got the picture. Carry on with whatever you two were doing.

Once your time is up and your friend has left for home, wait for a good 15 minutes or so, for them to either get back home or be well on their way there. Text your friend, "hey, you forgot your phone", and send them the photo you took of their phone on your table. Set a stopwatch running from the moment your friend sees the message.

Measure how many seconds it takes for your friend to process this and tell you to go fuck yourself.

instagram.

I love this. I’m all for these types of friendships but I think most ppl think anything intimate is too far but friends can do these things too

When I talk about queering friendship this is the type of shit I'm talking about. Just genuine, meaningful gestures and actions of love even within platonic relationships.

my friend told me that her boyfriend got her a super cool rock while they were on vacation together and you would not BELIEVE my disappointment when i realized she was talking about her engagement ring

*holds your head in my hands* im sorry i let you down

Here’s some fossilized coral.

Why are so many people convinced that babies are trying to manipulate them? They’re babies. They literally don’t know how to do anything except suck and scream and be confused. They’re not “manipulating” you. They’re experiencing extreme back pain.

Did you know that? That babies get back pain? They can grow over an inch in one day. Their bones are stretching and it hurts a lot and they don’t know why. Give them a break.

Also, people get so mad at toddlers for being upset. The toddlers are the ones who have never been angry before and are learning how to deal with it. You’re the adult who has had decades to learn how to deal with your emotions. Do you expect someone to know how to play piano on day one with no training? No? Then why do you expect the same thing with the entirety of how to be a human? You only think that walking is easy because you’ve been doing it for decades.

If you can’t deal with your emotions about what a freaking toddler is doing around you to the point where you feel that you have to beat them or scream at them, maybe you’re the one who needs to go back to preschool so you can be taught how to use your words.

Sun and Moon Granny Squares by AlyssiaCreates (Etsy)

Star Granny Square by AlyssiaCreates (YouTube Tutorial)

Flat Braid Join (YouTube tutorial)

Tiefling players everywhere:

Adult man horse girl moment when i had to sprint downstairs and explain the difference between hay and straw

HAY - grasses or legumes (such as alfalfa or clover) which are cut while green and dried for the purpose of feeding herbivores when fresh grass is not available

STRAW - the dried stalks of cereal crops (wheat, rye, barley, etc) which are harvested for the purpose of bedding for livestock or other animals after the seedheads are removed

Thank you. I was aware there was a difference but not what it was.

At least show us the bison!

The best update.

wholesome and true - do not mess with the wildlife