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Fifty-One Shades of Tseng

@allsortsoflicorice / allsortsoflicorice.tumblr.com

For anyone who used to follow 50 Shades of Tseng: I lost access to that blog for reasons too tedious to recount here. This is the replacement blog, 51 Shades of Tseng. The joke is a bit old now, but then, so am I.   * I sometimes write fan fiction about the FFVII Turks under the pseudonym "Licoriceallsorts". You can find me on AO3 and FF.net. * I am an adult. If you are under 18, please don't interact with me, because I don't want to interact with you.
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oflights

the main problem with this time of year is the irresistible urge to get fully into bed at like 5:34 pm and outside is like yesss, yesss do it, it's what you deserve yesss. like is it depression or is it just november

It's just November. Do it and enjoy it.

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“you don’t like the proliferation of terms like Unalive outside of TikTok because you realize that you’re aging out of youth culture and it makes you uncomfortable!”

no I don’t like it because there’s something INCREDIBLY dystopian about being forced to soften terms for basic parts of the human experience like death and sex (and even more so terms for oppressed minorities- call me a “le-dollar sign-bian” and I will bite you) purely because advertisers and corporations demand it

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Bot or not?

I was recently followed by an account that doesn't seem like an obvious bot. It dates back to 2017 and has plenty of posts. But all the posts are about one actor, and there's no connection to any of the topics I post about. This account has no reason to follow me.

I'm thinking it's a bot, maybe even some kind of zombie account. Am I right?

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This is a “maringuin”

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kaelio

Crane fly????

I call them crane flies, but most people I know would call them mosquito hawks or "those really big mosquitoes."

Ontario valley region, Canada: That there is a skitter hawk.

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wagnetic

That’s a skeeter eater

Canada, BC, but raised by prairie people mosquito hawk.

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casquecest

Originally from the Midwest US and I don't know that we ever had a name for this (or that I've actually seen it before).

It's a harmless, very dumb insect that somehow manages to get into your house and then slam itself into any window or light, trying to escape. They will also find themselves in our grocery store, where they will land in the refrigerated bunkers and slowly freeze to death.

In these parts of southeast USA, they are known as crane flies or "big mosquitoes"

UK, crane fly

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Life has become a lot better

In the last 12 months…

…. I have been diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder. At first I wasn’t sure if I wanted to get a diagnosis because I’ve always had health issues since childhood and I’m so tired of always being the walking oddball with a million issues. Getting diagnosed however, was great for my mental health, accepting myself and ending a lot of self-loathing issues.

… I stayed for nearly a year in a rehabilitation clinic for people with depression and difficulties getting back into education or the job market. I went in there having no idea what to do with my life and having a nervous breakdown every time I had to do anything involving work-related activities (writing my cv, phoning potential employers) and left with a clear vision of my future and twenty applications for the field I want to work in. The anxiety issues have vanished.

…I was accepted into a apprenticeship in my chosen field! The place has a good reputation and I wouldn’t have believed in a million years that I would get an offer. I thought the interview was a catastrophe (too nervous, questions I wasn’t prepared for, not “masking” well) but I was told afterwards that they found my passion for the subject great.

Getting to this point wasn’t easy, often exhausting and needed tons of self-discipline. Without the help and patience I received at the clinic this wouldn’t have been possible in the span of a year.

I know many people aren’t living in countries where this kind of care is easily available or affordable, but if you can get help, take it. I didn’t do this for many years due to many stupid reasons, and lost most of my twenties to depression. The internet can be helpful, but also a terrible echo chamber for people with mental health issues. Please keep going, even if getting through the day seems impossible right now. Keep hanging on. It took me a decade, and I still have bad days too, but I finally reached the turning point. If I can do it, you can do it too.

Congratulations! That is fantastic news, all of it.

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Turk Week 2023

Prompt: Unauthorized disclosure

I don’t know, man, it seemed to follow the prompt until I reread it - it was at least inspired by the prompt? Eh, hopefully it’s at least fun to read.

“Give it back.”

“Hmm….. Nope,” the older woman answered, staring at the item in hand and deftly keeping it from Reno at the same time.

“Oh come on. No one else is gonna give a shit about it, okay? Just give it back.”

“If no one else is going to care about it then why do you care if anyone sees it?” She smirked. Reno scowled and ground his teeth.

“I just do.”

“Well, it’s fair game.”

“You don’t even know what’s goin’ on in that picture,” Reno snapped.

“Nooo, but apparently it was something embarrassing, even for you.”

“I swear Vi, if anyone sees that -“

“Sees what precisely?”

“Boss!” The two chorused.

“Boss, she won’t give me back my picture,” Reno complained.

“You’re a Turk, take it from her,” Tseng muttered, looking at the papers in his hands rather than the squabbling Turks.

“Yeah, we ain’t allowed to kill our own,” Reno grumbled as she stuck her tongue out at him.

“Sir, Reno won’t tell me what the picture was about. He keeps saying that it’s none of my business.”

“…Let me see it,” Tseng sighed, rubbing his forehead with one hand and holding his papers out for the photo. Violet triumphantly slapped the photo on Tseng’s stack of papers and took a step back with a flounce, holding her hands behind her back. Tseng took his time bringing the photo into his line of sight. Vi hadn’t been with the Turks long enough to notice the subtle nuances in the man’s behavior on the rare occasion that he found something humorous, but Reno had and he wasn’t amused. It hadn’t been his most glamorous mission after all - if you could call it that. Who knew he’d even fit in that cramped space until Rude had forced him in. He’d gotten several second degree burns and four third degree burns, but they had accomplished their mission, like usual. Tseng’s mouth lifted very slightly at one corner and he handed the photo not back to Vi, but to Reno. “I’m afraid I can’t tell you anything about it. That mission is classified above your current pay grade.”

“Hey, but-“

“Reno outranks you, you may recall. Actually had he not been a part of it even he wouldn’t know anything about that particular mission.” Lies and bullshit, but Reno let out a relieved breath as Tseng walked off. He’d thank him for thatlie later, when Violet wasn’t around.

“Okay fine,” Vi pouted, crossing her arms and sulking against the wall, letting her ash-black hair fall half way over her face. “But seriously, Reno, how did you manage to fit under the hood of a running car?”

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I Know What I Know (if you know what I mean)

Omg, does this count as fluff?!  I had a lot of fun with this one, I'll be honest.

Nov 12 || Day 3

Word count: 2265 words. Content Notes: Interdepartmental cooperation at its finest. Really. Not sarcastic there at all. Characters: Reno, Rude, Tseng, Cissnei, Emma, Alvis, Ruluf, Freyra, Maur, Juget, Balto, Tseng, Veld, Heidegger.  [Just missing Nunchaku and Knife, tbh.] Soundtrack: "What I Am," by Edie Brickell & New Bohemians. Summary: There's a system for getting possibly less than legal things in the Tower.  Heidegger knows the Turks are at the center of it.

There was an exchange system available in the Tower, not that anyone would say that.  In fact, if pressed, not a single Turk would admit to even knowing about the exchanges.  They weren't, strictly speaking, above board.  But everyone benefited, and more importantly, there was a protocol for how the exchanges worked.

(Cissnei sat perfectly straight in the chair, her eyes wide as she stared up at Heidegger, who had chosen to stand specifically so that she would be intimidated.  At least, she assumed that was why he insisted on looming over the table, just like she assumed that was why he'd chosen her to start the interrogations with.  "Are you sure?  That doesn't sound like it follows protocol, sir.  What?"  She looked over at the security officer, dutifully sitting there with his notepad as he asked her questions.  "Have I ever participated?"  She looked back up at Heidegger.  "Sir, I didn't even know these things were happening.  How could I possibly have participated?")

Anything anyone could want could be obtained for a price.  And provided that the system was followed exactly.  The first step was to initiate the communication.  There was a mailbox just outside the coffee shop on the first floor where a letter with a request could be left.  After a day or so, an outdated form 86-H would appear in the paperwork that was handed out in the morning.  At the bottom would be printed the price for your request.

(Emma tilted her head, a low, tuneless hum escaping her.  "I see.  So you think these exchanges are detrimental to the cohesion of the unit?"  There was a moment of silence, and then the security officer stammered out something that sounded like a 'no.'  She nodded.  "Ah... Apologies.  I misunderstood.  So no, you don't think they're a problem at all."  Again, another set of stammers and Heidegger scowled at her.  "In that case, why are you questioning us?" she asked, and when he started to yell, she sighed.)

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Announcing Vincent Week 2023! It's been awhile since our February soiree, so let's give our favorite brooding boy some love for the winter months before his big debut in Rebirth! This weeks prompts are all based on winter, but feel free to get creative with them. 

12/17: Ice, snow, bitter

12/18: Wool, bells, adorn

12/19: Gift, candle, alpine

12/20: Ornament, memories, night 

12/21:  Cider, fire, warmth 

12/22: Fruit, garland, spirit 

12/23: Lights, festival, solstice 

Rules:

SFW and NSFW content is allowed, however you must tag sensitive content appropriately

Traced, plagiarized and AI works will not be accepted or re logged

Tag #vincentweek2023 to be featured 

FAQ:

Q: Do I have to do all the prompts?

A: No, you are free to pick and choose. 

Q: Do I have to do a prompt every day?

A: No. You can do as many or as few as you like. 

Reminder that #vincentvalentineweek is coming up! @ffviifandomcalendar

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I really think everyone needs to truly internalize this:

Fictional characters are objects.

They are not people. You cannot "objectify" them, because they have no personhood to be deprived of. They have no humanity to be erased. You cannot "disrespect" them, because they are not real.

I know this has good intentions, so I will just add the "how you treat them, even as objects of fiction, can speak about your own character, be careful out there"

Your addition is actually completely antithetical to my message. It is literally the opposite of what I am conveying.

Stop telling people to encourage the cop inside their head.

How you treat fictional characters, given they are entirely objects of fiction, does NOT necessarily speak to your own character, and you do not need to be "careful".

It is not dangerous to imagine dark things happening to fictional characters. It does not mean you are secretly a bad person. It does not mean you unconsciously want to hurt people in real life. It is not a "slippery slope" to doing bad things to people in real life. You cannot damage your brain or turn yourself into a bad person by consuming "dark" fanfic.

I can write tentacle noncon of my favorite character all day long and be a fierce anti-sexual assault advocate in real life because what I do in my head is not the same thing as what I do in real life.

if you don’t get your demons out on paper you take them out on people. I trust folks who make dark, weird, kinky art WAY MORE than anybody putting up a ‘wholesome’ front.

From repeated, harrowing experience.

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rosalarian

Fiction can *feel* real, but it isn't! It is impossible to victimize a fictional character. They do not exist. Trying to give some kind of "personhood" to fictional characters is honestly creepier to me than writing fucked up torture porn.

It's an uphill struggle trying to persuade large swathes of fandom that fictional characters are objects, when so many are keen to believe that these characters are so real they might possibly marry them. I think a lot of them have talked themselves into feeling that their fictional favourites are as real, maybe even more real, than actual flesh and blood people.