Okay this is just getting funny now
in the bible in revelations i think or somewhere, it warns you that near the end times, false prophets will pop up claiming to be the messiah. do you ever think scholars from like 700 years ago studying the bible would have thought this would be one of them
John the Elder: in my book I said beware false prophets as a warning
Christians: we have finally invented the false prophets from the hit Bible book that says beware false prophets
Everyone pick up your government-assigned fursona, grab your two colors then combine it with this random animal picker. Tell us what you get and no rerolls, I don't make the rules.
every fucking time I see this I miss the "7 month old" part, then when I see the image I fucking lose it. god fucking dammit
me: if I become the evil overlord I will never harm my minions
[5 years later]
highly throwable imp: hoohoohee
me: hmm
disco elysium players be like man I better save and make sure i have enough healing items there's a really tough paragraph ahead
houseanatomy replied:
Disco elysium players be like, better equip my logic hat so I don't fail the skill check and accidentally remember my wife
that is the face of a man worried he will be next
Sorry, he WHAT? Imagine being this man's boss and having to sit him down like. Listen. Brian. We need you to fuck the bird. You have to act like you're excited about it.
crane husband.....
this is the diametric opposite of all those awful swan wife stories and i love it.
(WalWaPo makes you jump through like three separate hoops before you can read the article, so I will share some of the highlights:
Legit cannot pick the funniest part of this
she has not been PROVEN to have killed her exes, but there is a PERSISTENT RUMOR (really officers she's simply DEVASTATED, she sobs, wearing a new feather boa unfortunately resembling her most recent deceased husband)
His name is Chris CROWE. (Mrs. Walnut Crane-Crowe?)
the mental images of a whole human man learning and performing the crane mating dance, and "sitting" on artificial eggs so she thinks he's performing his duties as a husband and father (and apparently OBJECTS if he does not?)
"chris, buddy, you gotta marry the possibly-murderous crane lady for the GOOD OF THE SPECIES." (alternately: "chris, my man! good news! we found you a very interested lady! She's 36, she's very spirited and independent, she holds a very important and rare status in her society! ...Is there a downside? WELL...")
chris sits any potential human partners down, like "my love, you must understand before we wed,,, i am already... Attached" (camera drifts wistfully to the above photo) "Lady Walnut and I have an,, Understanding... the relationship is open, but very committed"
just had to explain this post to my father bc he thought my stifled laughter was a signal of illness.
well done, everyone, good game. hit the showers.
Not only is he 'married' to walnut, this has apparently happened SEVERAL times, so he has MULTIPLE crane wives, none of which know about any of his other crane wives. This man is, for some unknown reason, irresistible to cranes
the “this content has been removed for violating Tumblr’s Community Guidelines” notice really adds a lot of flavor to this post and somehow makes it MORE obscene than whatever that actually was
World Heritage Post
linguini helgenstein
who are you and did you mean to send this to my art blog :v
😳😳😳
ohh mein gott, zhey're posting püssenvagen on ze instagrāmmen
yeah not leaving this gem in the tags
I don't know what I expected.
Y'all know that we don't actually NEED a lot of people to hunt the mammoth, and they don't need to do it very often, right?
Like, that's really more of a "small, specialized band of hunters" task than a "turn out the whole damn clan" type of task.
Plus a single mammoth has so much meat and other useful materials. I think we'll be fine.
#poll currently has 10% of us risking life and limb for meat and 90% on other activities which sounds right to me!#IIRC that is the proportion of hunting to gathering that many societies have had#we have way too many freeloading time travelers though#at least carry my basket full of roots berries and assorted herbs and mushrooms won't you
Exactly! The problem isn't the hunters, it's those darn time travelers! Least they can do is carry stuff and maybe bring us some sweet presents from the future.
Zepotha will never be Goncharov because when it comes down to it, tumblr culture is collaborative, while tiktok culture is merely iterative, and those are not the same thing.
Op I refuse to let your tags stay in the tags cause THIS!!!!!
Aleivtine, Hollow One Tiefling & Phantom Rogue, defier of death and incidental hero of the realm.
i don’t make the rules AT ALL, but if you mostly spend time in Gay People Spaces then you know about 28 ppl who look like this
I caught some!!!
feedback here and on twitter are leaving me with some REALLY interesting common reactions 1. that is a drawing of me 2. that would be a drawing of me except I grew my hair out (you didn’t escape) 3. these ppl are always MONSTERS / i’m enemies w these types of gays (i’m fascinated, i’m paying attention, i want the story behind this gut reaction) 4. their hair is usually blue or blonde (I almost gave the drawing blonde hair) 5. this is a white gay thing (basically yes) (see no.4)
6. i’m mad at you now for saying this is common (why) (it is common)
HOW AREN'T THERE MORE TUMBLR POSTS ABOUT THE GIANT AIRSHIP THE AIRLANDER 10 WHY DID I ONLY JUST FIND OUT ABOUT IT
IT LOOKS WORSE AT EVERY ANGLE
NO
of course you have blood all over you. and pronouns
easy website
^^^ me when I’m trying to calm down my horse named “Website”
weird horse
"Websight" is a Valid Warrior Cat Name!
train wreck of a post. hit reblog
