Ms. Revolver

Me rn

#My fav platonic soulmates <3

This is a serious issue though.

Ferrai has this bullshit agreement that if you buy one of their cars new off the lot, you have to sign a contract saying you basically don’t own the car and have to uphold their brand standards with it.

It’s sets a startling example of not owning something despite buying it and the court needs to use this as a chance to strike it down as unethical.

This shit again? And I thought it was bad enough with ford and john deer telling farmers they didn’t own the tractors they bought from them….

Yeah, they have this really unethical clause in the purchase contract you can’t modify the car or do anything with it that they’d consider “unbecoming of the brand”, which is why they were able file this suit.

It seems kind of bizarre at first until you realize how horrifying that is in the age of “do you own what you buy?” being a huge a debate (especially in tech).

This is pretty much Ferrari’s philosophy from the start, they are extremely prideful of their cars like if they were made from God’s hands or something. They are very snobby, infact the owner of Ferrari doesn’t like the people who buy their cars since because they are bought for “status”. They also never test their cars on public tracks in comparison with other racing cars like when they wanted to test out the Porche 918 Spyder vs The McLaren P1 vs LaFerrari. Take a guess who bailed out on the performance test.

Just an update

Lambo are the perfect people to jump in on this because they make insane cars and they are never above clowning them up because Lambo are all about THE DRAMA ™

even if nissan doesn’t really make exciting cars, i gotta give them a thumbs up for jumping in all sassy like

Lambo are also the perfect people to jump in on this because Lamborghini only became a car manufacturer to fuck with Ferrari.

See, this guy, Ferruccio Lamborghini, started out as a motorcycle mechanic and then got this idea to build tractors out of the military surplus equipment which was available in great abundance after World War II. This was a smashing huge success and he got hella wealthy at it, and so took up the hella-wealthy-people hobby of collecting sports cars.

One of these sports cars was a Ferrari 250 GT, which was apparently a pretty good car but he started having trouble with the clutch. This being not something you want to deal with when you’re paying supercar prices for a, y’know, supercar, he went to Mr. Enzo Ferrari to complain.

And Ferrari was like, “fuck you, the problem is with the driver, not the car. Go back to your tractors, you bumpkin.”

Which, as it happens, is a stupid thing to say to a guy who can build vehicles out of other vehicles that were never meant to resemble them, well enough to afford sports cars as a hobby. Mr. Lamborghini went back to his tractors and built a new supercar. With a proper clutch.

My gratitude to Deadmau5 for continuing this proud tradition.

My gratitude to

Deadmau5 for continuing

this proud tradition.

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

Please imagine some warrior culture (e.g. Klingons) getting super into video game esports in a relatively war-less setting and just getting insane about it

Like everyone at first thinks "haha, they probably don't understand video games because they're a bunch of bloodthirsty brutes" and it's a fuckin Space Orc Sweep at the Space Esports Tournament. Orc Devin, a scrawny nerd of an orc, gets absolutely HOISTED by his yoked-to-the-nines parents who are just so proud that their weakest son is their most victorious warrior. His fighting is done with more finesse, battling with his hands, mind, and eyes instead of RIPPLING BICEPS and POWERFUL GUTS and BARREL-CRUSHING THIGHS, but he battles nonetheless. His space hometown honors him with his own sword and a plaque. They rent out a space billboard bragging about how Orc Devin kicked everyone's asses and was the Most Badass Motherfucker in this cool new digital warfare they are now starting to get probably too-into as a culture.

#We all need a platonic soulmate like Steve 

One of the writers posted this lmaooo

the future is now

are people that lazy to need this

While I’m sure there are people too lazy to spin a fork, keep in mind people like this person who may be suffering from arthritis or a neurological disease or nerve damage or a thousand other conditions that might impair their ability to do things as simple as spin a fork to eat spaghetti. 

These are used with people who can’t grip well: 

This is for Parkinsons’s: 

For people who can’t even bend their joints: 

Here’s a product that guides your hand from your plate to your mouth 

This one holds a sandwich 

Like I get it. I used to see things like the fork and think “that’s fuckin’ lazy” or that product that holds a gallon and you just tip it and pour. But then I started working around the disabled and impaired and found out that these products aren’t meant for lazy people, they’re meant for people who need help. 

So maybe next time you see something, instead of thinking “Wow, are people that lazy?” just be grateful that you’re able to do the things you do every day and take for granted, like being able to feed yourself and wipe your own ass because you have enough coordination and bendy joints to do it. 

This isn’t specualtion either; the majority of products from commericals that we think are funny or silly are autally MEANT for hte disabled.But they are marketed towards the abled because the disabled aren’t considered a viable enough demographic on their own. the Snuggie for example? Created for wheelchair users.

This is actually really nifty.

oh my god of course the snuggie was for wheelchair users

The fact that anyone buys these products besides disabled people drastically lowers the price of them. These would normally cost hundreds if not thousands if dollars. Because if spent time and money creating it, the company wants to get more than that back. And they can’t do that if they sell and market these primarily to disabled people for $20-$40 a piece or whatever. They’d lose money on production. If they can sell hundreds of them to everyone, they can lower the price drastically and therefore disabled people don’t die while trying to scrape up the money to buy these things and be a bit more independent.

I never considered that last part and that’s actually genius

Like yeah, a handful of people ARE that lazy.

But those are the people who use these products even though they don’t need them and thus allow the price to be lower for those who DO.

So honestly in this case good bless the lazy and those prone to gimmicks because they are invaluable to the elderly and disabled in this sense.

@thebibliosphere Look! People learning about disability and why to be kind!

The normalization of disability aids needs to be a thing precisely so they can cost less.

This disclaimer pops up whenever I start talking

having a mutual who’s a good artist literally feels like beyonce saw me at a supermarket and decided to make me her best friend

humbled

I never go on twitter (because, you know, it’s twitter) but I just had a look at it to check up on Hank and I’m glad to see he’s being *extremely* Hank about this

some others i found in the notes

Are you struggling with being a writer? Well Have You Tried Poison Testing As A Hobby,

Hey students, here’s a pro tip: do not write an email to your prof while you’re seriously sick.

Signed, a person who somehow came up with “dear hello, I am sick and not sure if I’ll be alive to come tomorrow and I’m sorry, best slutantions, [name]”.

I mean, if someone wrote that to me, I’d probably believe they were sick.

“Slutantions” has me crying laughing

i once emailed my professor with a migraine. a mistake.

“I amsick will not to choir because i have a heache. i Hope its very and i am so sorry

love,

blue”

the subject line was “OW”

THE SUBJECT LINE IS THE BEST PART JSJFJSJDJS JUST IMAGINE GETTING AN EMAIL WITH NO CONTEXT OTHER THAN “OW”

As someone who has taught college, please send those emails because 1) We WILL believe that; no one would write that on purpose and 2) we need a laugh sometimes.

On the other side of this, once after getting taken to the ER by ambulance, I got an email from the professor whose class I’d passed out in, and the message had no text, just the subject line “you good?”

Reblogging for the last addition

Claritin makes me weird, but I have allergies so there’s about a month and a half block of time where I’m taking Claritin and am just weird most of the time.

Anyway, my last year of college, I got the flu or something in late March and was also taking Mucinex. I told my professor I couldn’t come to class one day by email except I couldnt think of what to say, so my medicated ass decided to make a Fry meme. I think it said something like “Not sure if I can go to class with a head the size of Texas, bottom text.” I didn’t think until the next day that it probably wasn’t socially-acceptable to tell your philosophy professor you weren’t coming to class via Tumblr style memes. When i got back to class, i found that she’d printed it out and taped it to the classroom bulletin board.

Oh shit you guys i turned on my WinXP laptop that I used to use back then.

IT WAS ON THE DESKTOP. THIS IS WHAT I SENT.

It’s even worse than i remember it

I laugh myself hoarse every time this post comes around, so here it is again.

Once emailed a professor from my hospital bed high on painkillers after a really bad car crash which my heart actually stopped the email “Dead cant class sory”

I wish every ao3 commenter a very kiss on the forehead

me and the girlies because the sky is dark and the weather is nice, cold, comforting and gloomy. and it will almost certainly be raining soon, we can already smell the scent of the rain in the air

heartbreaking: local thing has to leave the house even though it is so tired and sleepy and full of joint pain

I think the best most human thing in the world is strangers doing a silly thing together

Examples:

- guy at work "Yes, and -" ing the bit me and my coworker were doing where we pretended to be owners of a fantasy medieval tavern not minimum wage retail staff

- at the gay club when Die Young by Kesha came on and two hundred people, all dancing and drinking separately, jumped up and down to make the "- beat of the drums *STOMP STOMP*" as loud as possible

- person who watched me stomp round the beach singing a made up song about breakfast foods to name a cat after and suggested more breakfast foods that would be good cat names

- guy who started a dance off with everyone across the road while waiting for the lights to change

- very tiny girl at the pharmacy interviewing everyone in the queue and every single one of us in turn sat down and answered this toddler's questions like we were on Letterman

The three pillars of humanity, in no particular order, are Joy, Absurdity, and Sharing