strict parents survival guide!!
okay, so i know how y'all feel. if you’re always that one friend that has to cancel every plan just cuz you know ya mom is gonna say no, or you can’t go be out past 7, i gotchu😭i have some of the best tips and shit on how to sneak out, lie, etc if your parents are super controlling.
doors;
• twist the knob and pull up on it as hard as you can to minimize the noise it makes
• if you have a creaky door, FIX THAT SHIT BEFORE YOU SNEAK OUT. nothing is worse than it being 11 pm and you’re opening your door and waking everyone up. fixing it during the day is best.
• opening the door fast (but controlled) makes less noise (in some cases. test it out in the morning).
• DO NOT GO THROUGH YOUR MAIN DOOR. it’s really noticeable. if you have a window, take the screen out (you can usually easily pull out the little screws) and go through there. take a back door or go through the yard, whatever it closest to you and not something your parents will wake up to go pee and notice is different.
• leave the door exactly as you found it. if it was cracked, leave it cracked.
pets;
• your main goal is to shut them up. you do not want them barking or running around when you’re trying to leave. i have 2 fat ass cats that sleep in my room, and they’re always trying to run out when i open my door, and i live with four dogs. give them treats if you have to keep them quiet.
• avoid them as much as you can. try not to cross their paths, or your cover might be blown.
• wear socks when you sneak out, they help your feet make less noise. i find that crawling on all fours and spreading your body weight on the ground helps.
• if you have hardwood floors, staying on all fours or walking on your toes really slowly helps. even if it takes you all day to make it across the house, at least you’re not making noise 😂😭
• if you know there is creaky stairs/floorboards/etc, avoid them if you can.
parents;
• have an excuse if they catch you up. stay in ya pajamas or whatever you were sleeping in. some good ones are -
- getting a drink
- peeing/etc
- needed to grab an extra blanket
- couldn’t sleep
• make sure you have a backup plan in case they force you back to sleep, especially if you don’t usually wake up during the night it might seem suspicious.
• know what time they wake up and be back at least 45 minutes before then. for example, my dad leaves for work every weekday at 5 am, so i’d have to leave on a weekend or be back before 4:30-ish.
• always act natural. if you’re acting weirdly quiet or upbeat or trying to hard, it’s VERY NOTICEABLE that you’re lying.
• make it believable. if you’re not allowed to spend the night at people’s houses, don’t say “i’m going to stacys house for the night” like girl you’re going to get caught tf. if you work, say you have overtime, or if you’re in a sport, say there’s an extra practice.
• be reasonable. if you’re planning on going to ya bfs house all night, don’t just say you’re gonna go eat with your friends 😂
• know ur limits. there’s just sometimes where your lie is unbelievable or times where you just can’t lie your way out of something. stay in these limits.
• have a WHOLE STORY planned out. maybe even 2 or 3 to help out. nothing’s worse than lying to ya mom and then her asking for proof or extra info and you don’t know. if you say you’re gonna be at a friends house, actually go there first. take hella pics in different outfits for whenever you need them and send them to her. hell, my mom made me send pics of my friends cat for proof before 💀
• if you get caught, i feel you girl. just go with ur gut and weasel ur way out of it. say you weren’t thinking, or you felt it was an easier thing to do. apologize and act like a holy child and it’ll help u out.
if you’re not allowed to date or have a bf, i understand you too 😭🤷🏼♀️i have a lot of experience with this.
• never ever let your parents think you’re hanging with a guy or give them a reason to. don’t slip up and say their name or anything. keep everything lowkey. say you’re going with a friend.
• for my 16+ girls, if ur gonna do the dirty with your boy, have hella excuses. have backup plans. have good lies prepared for your parents. use protection.
• to conceal hickeys, use a color correcting concealer for whatever color your love bite is, then a regular concealer with some powder and it should be gone. icing it also helps change the color and fade it.
• let your bf know your parents are hella strict. my ex broke up with me bc i didn’t tell him i wasn’t allowed to hang out with anyone like ever. he should understand.
if your parents check your phone/apps/messages, these are some tips that should help.
• ANY pics in your camera roll you wouldn’t want ya mom or dad seeing, screenshot them and put them in your my eyes only on snapchat. lock those up for just yourself or whatever.
• delete sexual/explicit messages you’ve sent OR received. if someone sent u dick pics, put them in my eyes only to expose later, or just delete em 😂😭
• download google photos and transfer all your pics and stuff to there. you can archive them and then your camera roll is 100% pure.
• social media is tough. if your parents check it, make sure it’s clean and appropriate. make a finsta or extra acc for the more private stuff. for snapchat, change that guys name from “big dick #3 🤤” back to his name bro 💀 change any weird names. if they check ur memories (which is wild), move everything to my eyes only and pretend u forgot ur password.
• clear ya search history, or if that’s too noticeable, clear it and then google random shit to fill it up.
i think that’s it for this post, i might make a part 2. good luck to y'all with strict parents, i’m praying for yall ❤️
