Ryan

don’t get to know me, i’m better as a concept in your head

Once my boyfriend told me: "You're not a burden. A burden is something you're forced to carry against your will. I freely choose to be a part of your life and that means you aren't a burden to me." I'm passing it on in case some of you need to be reminded of that.

Cuddle bug

omg imagine being born and you are on a spaceship and everyone aboard is sooo so mad at you just because you burst out of some guy's chest to be born. like um sorry i've not been alive before i didn't even know that's not allowed please be nice to me um the spaceship floor is cold is no one going to knit me some little booties i am calling child protective services

sorry. what the fuck was that?

he gaggy on my rogers until I whoopsy-doo

albatrosses will wipe the floor with any species of bird you choose to compare them to. they’re the Most, or at least Extremely, by almost every metric

wingspan. lifespan. intricacy of mating dances. devotion to monogamy. investment in offspring. ability to circumnavigate the globe. literary symbolism that is flexible but not to the point of meaninglessness. eyeliner quality. I could go on

This is Wisdom. She’s at least 71 years old. In the photo is one of her chicks, that she had at age 69. Her last chick was hatched in 2021, though she hasn’t bred for the last two years since her mate has disappeared.

She has flown an estimated 3,000,000 miles since 1956

aleapofbeauty on ig

princess peach at the sperm bank

nothing could have prepared me for that comment

mario at the sperm bank

this is the funniest fucking thing ive ever seen

Du Gay 👉