All this episode did was prove alice cooper is bisexual if nothing else. Just saying

[on a date]

date: let’s eat dinner

me: ok

dinner: *is eat*

do👏not👏say👏you👏have👏depression👏because👏an👏online👏test👏said👏you👏have👏it👏so👏if👏you👏arent👏diagnosed👏s👏t👏f👏u👏

I’m stuck between needing someone to talk too and not letting people get to close

yall ever be losing your fucking mind but chilling at the same time

So you think your child should be strong enough to endure beatings and humiliation and insults and complete emotional abandoment, but you are allowed to go on and be a pathetic coward and weakling to the point where you’re too sensitive to even hear that you hurt your child? You think you get to demand that? You think after everything you’ve forced your child to endure, you are the one who gets to act all weak and hurt if your child or anyone points out to you that you’re not a good parent? That you completely and utterly failed in keeping your own child safe?

What the fuck do you think will happen when your child, having endured all this pain and abuse, has to continue with life? Do you think after enduring what you threw their way they’ll have no trouble dealing with the rest of life? Do you think you prepared them for something? Human strenght is expendable! You forced that child to be strong for you when they were at their weakest, not even developed stage, you think that will not leave a trace? Your child will miss out on so many life experiences because they will have to mourn, because they will be lost in terror you put in them, because they will have to feel the grief of not having a parent, not having being kept safe, not having a family and not having anyone who cared enough for them to protect them when they were too young to protect themselves. Your child will re-live everything you to them did and fear intimacy, trust and love because you taught them they should expect pain and fear from their loved ones! Your child will carry the burden of your weakness and your cowardice and incapability of love well into the adulthood and they will break. Because no child or adult can carry that kind of burden for someone else. And when they collapse after being strong from the day one, being strong instead of you, being strong where they had no strength to draw from anymore, where will you be? You will still cowardly be telling them that they broke because they weren’t strong enough! You will still find that you get to be a weakling, you get to be a pathetic, cowardly burden on them and act like they should still be strong instead of you! You will still have your child believe that it’s their strength that failed them, and not yours! You will still act like they should tiptoe around your sensitivity and your fragile little ego and your projections of yourself as a great person while you call them too sensitive for feeling the pain you don’t want to hear you caused to them! Because you don’t want to admit that you did this, that you are not a good parent, you are not a good person, you have done it wrong, you have failed as a human being, you destroyed a child who you cursed into relying on you.

You are a disgrace to your child. Apologize to your child. Apologize for what you did to their life. Apologize for all the cowardice and weakness. Apologize for having them be strong when they were a child, where you couldn’t have been strong as an adult. Apologize for forcing them to have a person like you in their life. Apologize for taking away their family, their childhood, their faith in humanity, their experiences, their time, their care, their trust. It’s been enough of your child being strong for you. It’s time you picked up your shit and carried it yourself. Children have been strong enough. Children have been strong enough.

When I was about two years old, I pulled on a hanging plant and succeeded in pulling it down from the top of the closet, and it fell directly onto my head, cutting it open, and causing me to bleed severely. My parents often told me this story to remind me what a bad, disobedient and nuisance child I was. I thought it was true, after all, no good child goes out of their way to destroy plants and get head injuries. What I can take from it now that nobody was watching over me even when I was two. It wasn’t only child injury I had, I also fell from the trailer onto the pavement directly on my head, spent days in bed, bleeding, vomiting. They loved to remind me thats why I was so stupid, I got my head injured, it was no wonder my brain wouldn’t work properly, that’s why nothing I ever said would be smart or worth hearing. I thought it was my own fault, and that I brought all that onto myself.

These people were taking pleasure in an toddler suffering injuries they failed to protect it from. Not only they weren’t worried something would happen to me, they punished me for “making them worry”. If I would show up with an injury I would be beaten to make up for all the “worry I caused them.”

This is how far abusive parents are capable of twisting the child’s perspective of what happened and whose fault it is. Even though facts display blatant neglect, indifference and hatred on their side, they had no trouble convincing a child it has done wrong, to simply be and exist and do as all children do. As children have no frame of reference, and have to see themselves thru their parent’s eyes to figure out what their role in family and society is, they have no choice but to accept what they’re told, that they’re at fault for being neglected, dismissed and hated.

Maybe what your parents blame you for all this time wasn’t your fault at all. Maybe what they’re making you feel bad for is something you didn’t even do. Maybe all this time they’ve been making atrocities one after another and making you feel like shit for simpy being there. Even though it was them also, who put you there. Maybe there’s more to self hatred than facing your faults. Maybe they were someone else’s fault, but you couldn’t tell, and were forced to take them on as yours. Maybe there’s nothing you should be ashamed of. Maybe your parents should feel that shame.

“Your father would be disappointed”

“Not even close to how much I’m disappointed in him.”

abusive parents claiming they were abused too basically means after they’ve suffered at the hands of their parents they went: “just wait until i get to do this to my kids too”

being born to abusive parents be like, “your survival is sponsored by a dangerous psychopath good luck with that”

realizing and accepting your parents are both abusers is as painful as if your parents both died, but they also weren’t your parents in the first place, you never had any parents

Every time you think “they could have hurt me worse”, remember that you shouldn’t have been hurt at all. You should have received support and help on everything you struggled with. You should never have faced pain from the hands of your loved ones. You should have been safe and happy and without a care in the world as a child. That’s what you compare your abuse to. 

Me: *tries to sleep* Brain: hELLO anD WELCOME TO FLASHBACK CENTRAL

if you have a hazy childhood memory of just screaming at your parents “WHY DON’T YOU JUST KILL ME” we are in the same boat