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one of my main nicknames courtesy of my family is “emmy” and my uncle was like “what if you marry a guy named anthony whose nickname is tony then you’d be emmy and tony” 

and then “what if his last name was award”

and then my cousin put in “if you have a son you could name him oscar”

emmy, tony, and oscar award

  • Journalist: [...] but guess what! Tom finally found a girlfriend. Her name is Ria and she's from Hambur-
  • Bill: Yeah, I still can't get over the fact that he has someone and I don't
  • Tom: Well, I-
  • Bill: But you know, it's always difficult for girls because me and Tom, we come in a double-pack
  • Tom: That's true, but Ria-
  • Bill: because the most important person for me will always be Tom, and the most important person for Tom wILL ALWAYS BE ME
  • Tom: Yes but-
  • Bill: we are like one person and like sOULMATES. Did you hear that, Tom? SOULMATES.
  • Tom: Wha-
  • Bill: I AM YOUR SOULMATE. IT'S ME. ME. GOT IT?
  • Tom: ...
  • Journalist: ...
  • Bill: i'm done *walks away*
  • Journalist: ...
  • Tom: ... *whispers* he still can't accept it
  • Bill: I HEARD YOU TOM
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