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Elyssa, a question. How do you channel all of your feelings into well-organized and coherent (and brilliant) meta essays about, for example, Harry James Potter, or Gale, or Angel? I ask because I am inevitably going to attempt to do the same with my Dawn Summers feelings and I don't know how to put all of my thoughts and feelings into words and in an order that makes sense.
it is a multistep process involving much thought and wit.
first i find something to love. then i discover that the thing i love is hated by everyone (this is an inevitable part of the process). then i set up camp and read all the things people say about my baby because i like to torture myself i guess.
then i sit and seethe for a while. set up my meta fortress. and then i cry.
about the injustice of it all, of course, but also because i love them so muhuhuhuch and no one will ever understand. and then i sit and think some more. and then i go to school and the gym and the supermarket and i think some more.
and then some wise soul on the internet reads my mind and asks about my feelings on x, y, z, and all my feelings look spontaneous but no i’ve been carting them around in my brain all day every day for a week.
and then i cry again.
this time because i love the things i love more than a human being should love anything, really. and then i type some stuff and i post it. oh and then i copy and paste paragraphs around so it looks like i have linear thought patterns.
the key is time and feelings. and sometimes caffeine or interestingly exhaustion, depending on the human. but yes, time to ponder, feelings that must be expelled or you will collapse and die. so i’d say spend the next 24 hours having your entire life consumed by dawn summers and something will pop out. the best stuff i’ve ever written, original writing-wise, were stories and poems i had wanted to write for years but never got around to doing until they burst out of me like a ray of sunshine. time and feelings.
that is my wise wisdom. a how to guide on how to have your life ruined by fictional characters and have it come out looking like you still have control over any aspect of your consciousness.
What are your feelings/thoughts on Sawyer/Juliet?
I love Sawyer/Juliet. I was not expecting them to happen and had this hilarious notion of them in my head and then they did and it was beautiful. I do believe I was watching La Fleur with @crackly and lost control of my hands. I love them, I do, they fill me with sunshine and kittens. But at the same time, I would have really appreciated it if it didn’t coincide with the rather speedy sidelining of Juliet Burke. I just feel like she sort of falls off the map of narrative agency the more Sawyer/Juliet goes on, and then The Incident happens and there is little more egregious. I (unsurprisingly) wrote a mini-essay of sorts about the way Lost reduces women to wife/mother roles, and this is part of what I said about Juliet:
When she, Sawyer, and the boaties are left on the island, Juliet has the opportunity to become a true leader. Sawyer somehow takes that position, but Juliet does get a sort of second-in-command, the position of the great woman behind the great man that women have theoretically occupied for centuries. Sawyer goes out to negotiate with Richard; Sawyer concocts lies to protect them in the Dharma camp; Sawyer becomes head of security while Juliet becomes a mechanic, which, given her response to Amy’s labor in ‘La Fleur,’ seems to be almost a sense of self-imposed purgatory for her failure to save pregnant women. Thus, her inability to perform her functional role as protector of women’s reproductive capabilities constitutes punishable behavior.
To a large extent, ‘La Fleur’ is the last time we experience Juliet’s power. The rest of the season she largely functions as an emotional support system for Sawyer, and the finale presents her as an irrational woman acting under jealousy rather than a rational actor with agency. She goes along with Jack’s plan because she is jealous of Kate and suddenly insecure in her relationship with Sawyer. Juliet Burke doesn’t decide to try and blow up an island so she doesn’t have to lose her boyfriend. Juliet Burke doesn’t act irrationally — everything she does is rational, almost too rational, since getting to that island. But the Juliet we see in the finale prior to her final act is one we are meant to read as both irrational and hyper-emotional. This is not to discount Juliet’s strength or sacrifice in detonating that bomb. What it does say, though, is that even in Juliet’s arguably bravest moment, the motivations for her actions are a response to Sawyer, not to her own rational decision-making (to be certain, Jack does quite a lot of irrational thinking in this episode as well). Even when the finale attempts to retcon Juliet’s actions as not born out of jealousy, she says she wanted it to work to get Sawyer off the island. This particular aspect I can respect. People in love should want the best for the one they love, though generally killing oneself for that goal isn’t the best decision. Her name is Juliet, after all. But Sawyer’s all-encompassing grief in season six seems to place Juliet’s death as a plot point on the path of a somehow more vital male character, rather than the loss of a powerful, strong woman in her own right.
So, complicated. I love them. Please do not misunderstand. They make faces and I love faces. But they also end up sidelining Juliet sometimes and I hate when ships do that, when they shove women to the side. Lost loves to do that, and Elizabeth was leaving so they had to pull stuff together quickly. Further, Sawyer/Juliet is hardly the only example. Lost doesn’t like its women; it is known. But I am left ultimately with very complicated feelings, the predominant one of which is love! But then there’s also the other stuff, which I feel compelled to talk about as well.
can we talk about how Angel is the most boring part of the series of the same name
and how all the secondary characters are what make me love it as a series? like Cordy, Doyle, even Wesley, Gunn, Fred (omg Fred is gonna show up soon in my rewatch omgg), Lorne (hi i love Lorne so much) are so much more interesting. and i genuinely love them and their friendships. but i could give a shit about Angel.
- Me: Ahh today has been crazy and draining maybe if I watch some TV I'll get distracted and won't have so many feelings
- Supernatural: lol yeah right assbutt
- How I Met Your Mother: you think this is just a sitcom? Oh, honey.
- Parks and Rec: Get ready to spend 20 minutes each week flailing over Adam Scott's hair and perfect ships
- Torchwood: Sexual tension and surprise sadness coming right up.
- Sherlock: Sit the fuck down, this is going to hurt-
- Doctor Who: Right in the feels.
- Me: k
Top 6 AUs. Top 6 current OTPs. Top 6 shows you don't watch but have feelings for via others.
AHHHHHHHH. THESE ARE GOOD ONES.
Top 6 AUs.
- Politician AUs. All of them. I love them.
- College AUs.
- High School AUs.
- Modern Royalty AUs
- Restaurant AUs
- Dance AUs.
Top 6 Current OTPs
- Usagi/Mamoru - Sailor Moon
- Ichigo/Rukia - Bleach
- Sansa Stark/Jaime Lannister - ASOIAF
- Thor/Jane - Thor
- Jon/Dany - ASOIAF
- Rachel/Success - Glee
Top 6 Shows You Don’t Watch But Have Feelings for Via Others
- The River - you and C and your liveblogging lol
- Gossip Girl - Dan/Blair FOREVER.
- Castle - mostly because faces, I guess
- Prison Break - never seen an episode in my life but you and your FEELINGS
- Young Justice
- The Good Wife
we are re-watching old episodes of the office now as my parents are falling asleep and i just remember HOW CRAZY INTO IT i was as the, like, third season was coming out (at the time i didn’t really tune in on cable, i waited for the season to come out on dvd) and HOW INTENSE i felt about jim and pam and their relationship it was so goooooood.
this has been a post about my feels about early seasons of the office and my original otp