Bad and Worse: Snack Time
What’s BAD: The 10-year-old kid with the intense athlete’s-foot fungal infection on both feet, due to rarely (never?) changing his filthy socks or washing his feet.
What’s WORSE: The rest of his family obviously doesn’t value personal hygeine much either (I had to breathe through my mouth for the entire visit).
What’s WORST: As I’m trying to politely educate the parents on the need for basic habits like bathing and doing laundry, I notice the kid picking off flakes of dying skin from between his toes… AND POPPING THOSE YUMMY BITS INTO HIS MOUTH.
TSK: Not sure what you want from me, lady...
- 50-something female patient (here for "painful urination for 8 days"): What took you so long to come back?
- Cranquis: Um, the urine test takes 3 minutes to run, sorry about that. The result definitely shows a bladder infection.
- Patient: Well DUH, I told you I had a bladder infection when I came in here, like FOREVER ago.
- Cranquis (glancing at computer, which shows she has been in our clinic for a grand total of 15 minutes so far): Well let me just send off the antibiotic prescription for you and...
- Patient: I don't want any antibiotics! I just wanted to confirm I had an infection.
- Cranquis (glancing at computer, which shows that it only FEELS like I've been in this room for FOREVER): ...
TSK: Riddle me this
What is the mysterious impulse which causes someone to wake up one day and say:
You know that painless bilateral leg swelling I’ve had for the past 5 years? The swelling that I keep forgetting to mention to my primary care provider at every visit I’ve ever had? Well today is the day to get that crap figured OUT. And no I will NOT make an appointment to see my PCP — by jove, I’m going to the URGENT CARE. And hell yes, I’m gonna demand a full work-up be done today! And heck no, I am not going to go to the follow-up appointment with my PCP next week!
