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IT REALLY ANNOYS ME HOW ONLY GIRLS GET CALLED OUT FOR SWEARING TOO MUCH BECAUSE “ITS NOT LADYLIKE” FUCK YOU IM NOT HERE TO BE “LADYLIKE” IM HERE TO KICK ASS

my saturday was going pretty well until i realized it was sunday

#why

pretty emotional update

if you cut your pizza into really small pizzas you can use it as a topping for a different pizza

#so much pizza

i was havin a great time until i remembered that i was ugly

why is pollination not called floral sex

BUT THEY LOOK LIKE THE CAST OF A GAY SOAP OPERA IM LAUGHING SO HARD

#10k

zayn probably cries himself to sleep whispering “malabami”

*accidentally sexts you the wikipedia article on richard nixon*

having followers who don’t like your posts

#i'm blocking all of you bye

[dresses in all black] [gets fake mustache] [puts on sunglasses] [looks nervously over shoulder] [double checks time] [takes deep breath] [goes into office depot to buy one direction school supplies]

there are bands w choreographed routines and singers who put on shows w fireworks but somehow I’ve fallen in love with the one where they roll around and eat bananas on stage I could probably go to a zoo and see the same thing for a lot less money

I talk a lot of shit for someone who is probably going to end up with One Direction school supplies

my minds telling me tank top liam

but my body

my body is also telling me tank top liam