so i called the nearby starbucks to see if they were open because my dad wasn’t sure and wanted me to ask so i asked them in gollum’s voice “HELLO IS PRECIOUS OPEN TODAY?”
and the guy on the other line replied with “YES PRECIOUS IS OPEN TODAY UNTIL 3 MY PRECIOUS YESSSSSSSS”
I FUCKING FLIPPED OUT AND I WAS LAUGHING AND SOBBING
AND THE GUY ON THE OTHER LINE ASKED “IS PRECIOUS OKAY”
Me joking with my mom about marrying Ed Sheeran
- Me: Well we can't get married yet. I mean he's on tour and would be away for a while
- Me: Besides he has to write some songs about me first!
- Mom: Wait hasn't he already written a song about you?
- Me: What?
- Mom: Yeah. How does it go?......You Need Me, I Don't Need You?
- Me: I see how it is
- Tegan: Sara.. she wrote the chorus. So she's the sexual one, she's the deviant. I was like 'I wanna hold your hand, I wanna get closer. The spark before the dark, the rush before the touch.' and Sara's all like 'I just wanna get physical!' *Hip thrusts*
- Sara: There better not be a gif about that on Tumblr!
- Tegan: I don't have the internet anyway... so-
- Sara: When the world ends, there will be that gif and cockroaches.
- Tegan: Alright, so... Sara's already been a bitch.