What do I miss most about home?
This is a question I get asked regularly. And I can categorically answer what I miss most.
In truth it’s my dogs.
Even though at home they lived with my ex girlfriend and I would often go weeks or months without seeing them, I miss them more then words can describe.
I have purposely not let my ex know my US phone number just to keep things easy and let me carry on this part of my life guilt free.
I just miss knowing that I had access to them whenever I wanted to. I miss their personalities. I miss that Maisie would lay on my couch and sleep all day and how Tallulah wouldn’t leave my side.
I need them in my life. I need the love that a dog brings.
Here in the city it wouldn’t be fair on any dog. I work 9 hours plus a day and I would never leave a dog alone that long. I want a social life on top of that and it wouldn’t be fair.
I don’t think I would just want a dog for having a dogs sake. I want my dogs. My Maisie and my Tallulah.
I want to wake up with them and walk around Central Park with. Or even better take them somewhere they can run and hunt like I used to back in Reading.
I just miss the unfaltering love I got from them. Knowing that they are still alive, well and being looked after by someone else kills me.
Meet Me By The River's EdgeThe Gaslight Anthem
The Gaslight Anthem - “Meet Me By the River’s Edge”
I can’t take no more regret/
it cut us deep into our souls,
and then it climbed into our bed.
Now when I drive the 101,
on ‘those’ ‘California’ nights…
and I’m amazed at all those stars,
beneath that old hollywood sign…
It’s been months since I’ve had a close friend of any sort.
Day to day, going through things, never getting to talk or pray or laugh with anyone else… it used to make me sad, lonely. Now it’s just become another reason to draw close to Jesus all the more.
I’m going to be so thankful when God brings friendship back into my life.
Until then, and still then, He will always be my Best Friend.