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Too Tired to Tap
Lets put it this way-Im usually calling the shots in everybodys life, separating the great ideas to the dumb ones. I finally get a chance to work on mine…& everthime I get the chance to, I just wanna cry so hard but I cant. Too many bodies look up to me & I feel like the minute they find out how I do things, how I handle different situations, they would flee to the highest mountain & stay there. Sorry for dumping this on you I’ll shut up…*sigh*I guess I do what I can to avoid my life & make sure others are set straight, I get so caught up working on my own. I cant just drop everyone & work on me, my heart is different from others. I give more then a damn or two shits…but at the same time I feel lie I shouldnt have people giving the same kind of support I give them. I feel like I dont deserve it…but at the same time, I dont wanna feel abandoned. ya know? Ugh, I sound like a little bitch. Im sorry bro. im stubborn-thats nothing new, but I was also brought up in a stae of mind where you were, well, lower than your peers. fucked up huh? I cant believe Im at a point where I honestly & truly feel like shit right now…its really pissing me off…
back then-have 5-7 back-to-back kickboxing matches or have someone tie my hands behind my back & let my Chosen opponent beat me down for 1hr. Now…I hold shit in form everyone else & continue on with life. yeah. after the hour was over, they would literally look at me like I was fucking crazy & lose all respect for me. Shunned in other words. Stupid as it may sound, I did it. My father would want nothing to do with me from weeks end till months later. I only did it so 1) shit in my head could be gone & 2)…be accepted.
Now with everything screaming at a frequency that no human can withstand, I don’t know how Im still here. I try to be the best that I can for everyone around me, but little by little, I’m becoming a disappointment to many, but a staggering body to all. I try to state myself to others, even tho they are listening, they’re expressions are screaming off their faces. They say if it doesn’t come out of the mouth, its not true. I say a pictures worth a thousand words. Why speak when its written across your face? So much for the good guys in life…we may be blessed for our antics & lifestyles, but who can really understand you?
I am getting really annoyed and fed up with this whole “Taylor Swift is a man eater” “Taylor Swift is seen as elegant while Miley Cyrus who has been with the same man is considered a whore” “Taylor Swift is such a hoe bag”.
So what you’re telling me is that you’ve never met a 23 year old who has dated her share of guys? Ever? In all honesty, if you were famous and can date whatever famous guys you want to, you wouldn’t date them? She’s simply a young adult in her twenties! The only difference between her and that random chick that goes to some random university is that her life is constantly being flashed in front of you due to the media!
And the double standard that we hold for females and males is disgusting. A male celebrity can date/marry/fuck as many women as he wants, and it’s all okay. Yet a female celebrity dates a handful of guys and she’s automatically a slut. You want to know why she is still seen as classy, and Miley isn’t? Because Taylor is classy enough not to take semi-nude photos of herself. Taylor isn’t in some video of getting high. Taylor doesn’t skip around in clothing that would fit a three year old.
The only reason she has been getting so much backlash lately is because she’s decided to date a Directioner. Fans who would sing her praises now hate her guts because she is dating someone that they probably would have never had a chance with.
To conclude my rant, grow the fuck up.
okay me too o.o
NOW HE’S ASKING SPARTACUS HOW HE LIVED THROUGH LOSING HIS WIFE AND THEY’RE ALL TEARY EYED AND OMG, I’M ACTUALLY CLOSE TO TEARS RIGHT NOW.
AND SPARTACUS KEEPS TELLING HIM THAT THEY CAN FIGHT TOGETHER AND SHIT AND OMG, TOO MANY FEELS.