Easter in America
On one part of Earth kids are going to be picking eggs up off the ground and enjoying candy. At the same time another kid, on another part of the Earth, is going to die from starvation. Yeah I want to ruin your holiday. Yeah I think there’s something wrong with it. It’s just hard for me to be in the mood to celebrate a holiday while being conscious of others. I’ve thought about how I do nothing myself to help them either. But then again maybe you could consider these words something. I have absolutly nothing to give. I looked into volunteering and I don’t even have the money to do that. So I guess the only thing I can do is be that jackass on facebook telling everyone what idiots they are. I guess if nothing else at least I can keep them in my mind and suffer with them that way. It’s a different type of suffering because physically all my needs are met by my family. But I will not allow myself to enjoy things like I used too. Honestly even if I wanted too, I couldn’t. I don’t say any of this because I’m sour or bitter. I say it because I think it needs to be said. Tomorrow I will still smile. It just wont be the same. When I was a kid and all I cared about was myself I was much more lively and full of humor. Now I will have apprecation without indulgence. I will feel Happiness but not Joy. I won’t respect but I will show kindness. Have a Happy Easter.
I Can't Take This Anymore.
Fat. F-a-t. I cannot stop eating. Why am I so hungry? I need to stop. This has gone on for too long. I don’t undertsand why starving on and off is so frowned upon. It helps me. I get skinnier. My stomach gets flatter. I feel better. I wanted to stop starving for my friends. They thought I was going to kill myself. But I need to do this. They don’t and never will understand.