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day 41Jenna Fletcher
It got dark. We broke our bones in all the right places ‘till they looked like loose teeth, jagged, one and the same. You said you’d bring me flowers, but you didn’t know what they looked like. I tried to explain them, purple and small, but couldn’t get the wording right. I have been struggling. My glasses are off and my palms are empty of the weights (gave it all up for sitting in silence, watching cities blur into streaks of color). Been spending my days staring out windows, music turned up so loud in my headphones that I can’t hear the way the world whistles as I pass by it. Been trying so hard, and these muscles are tired. We made pasta in my kitchen and the whole bottle of wine emptied long before it should have. I was rosy cheeks and kissing you like it didn’t make me sad. Of course it does. It is dark, my glasses are off. Warmed my hands on a single idea, flickering—don’t know how to put it out, don’t know how to put you out.