Pulled an all-nighter with Tumblr up in the background. Apparently I don’t follow enough people in other parts of the world, because there were hours-long dry spells. Got ridiculously excited when people started posting again. I feel like that annoying kid who won’t get off people’s back porches.
“Hi Mrs. Finkle can Jimmy come out to play?”
“FOR THE LAST TIME NO YOU LITTLE TURD NOW GET OFF MY PORCH.”
So, my laptop kinda broke.
Whenever I try to switch it on it flickers between various loading screens for a minute or two, and then suffers a self-inflicted heat death. Even if I manage to get a fan that’s up to the job, the screen flickering is making me think that the whole thing is going to need to be restored to factory settings if I want to get it back up and running.
This means two things: 1) I’m not going to be on tumblr for a while, 2) The Sims Unchained is no more.
I really want a hug, or for this week to be over right now, or something really amazing to happen, or all of them simultaneously. I’m really sorry for being here feeling bad and sorry about myself, but this week has been the worst (like i’ve said before) and I just want to lie on my bed and curl up into a ball and probably cry for a while. Yes, I’m being overly-dramatic. Things have gotten so bad, I’m more lost than I was before, and that feeling of uncertainty, of not knowing what I want to do and just being stuck here while I do things that I like but that really, really, make me unhappy, it is the most horrible feeling. So I’m adding “finding what I want to do” to my never ending list of things that I wish could happen right now. No, but seriously, I probably won’t sleep tonight because of this fucking project that I didn’t have time to do before because I already had a lot of things to do and even though I knew this was going to be one of the hardest I left it for right now and yes, I’m dying and complaining instead of doing it. But I’ve cried a lot now and I really feel like shit and my parents think I’m joking. So there’s nothing else I can do, really. I could use a hug, very badly. Or even some wise words. I don’t know, a world war? Ok, no. But I really need something, anything.
