Rules:

1. Always post the rules.
2. Answer the questions the person that tagged you has written and write 11 new ones.
3. Tag 11 new people and link them to your post.
4. Let them know you’ve tagged them.

• Favorite beverage?

My favorite beverage would have to be chocolate milk because I am completely and utterly classy and a mature adult. 

• Forest or Beach and why?

This is kind of a tough question because while I like the sun and the ocean, I do not like sand in my ass or anywhere else for that matter and while I like the forest for all the tall trees, the scents and foliage, I actually fucking hate nature.

I choose neither. I choose my room.

• The last thing you complained about?

Lol do we really want to go here? I think the last time I complained about something was internally and it was “that is the last time I fall asleep on my robe again” because I always wake up with stomach aches and then I think to myself “what did I eat?” And I never ate anything, so I’m like egads, what the fuck is goin’ on? BUT OH, WHAT AM I SLEEPING ON? A FUCKING LUMPY-ASS ROBE. THAT’S WHAT. DIGGING RIGHT INTO MY FOOD DIGESTER. I CAN SEE CLEARLY NOW, THE RAIN IS GONE.

• When was the last time you thew up?

Ummm… Two weeks ago? At Joe’s house. I liked the red wine a little too much apparently.

• Can you speak and/or write any foreign languages?

I can barely speak Italian. And I can barely write Italian. Bam.

• Favorite and least favorite vegetable?

My favorite vegtable would have to be potatoes. I think those are vegtables, right? And my least favorite is spinach. I hate it so much, I pronounce it incorrectly: spin-knock.

• Dogs or cats?

I really like both. Because I have a high probability of winding up a lonely and bitter cat woman, I love cats and I think they are just as cold and intollerant of humanity as I am. But then, I really think dogs are very cute and likeable despite the fact that they are all over the place. I openly aspire to owning a male Pembrokeshire Corgi. I want to tie a little red scarf around its neck and name it Scooter. c:

• Are you a morning or a night person?

Night Person to the CORE. I am up at all hours and prefer the nighttime over the daytime because people can’t see my face - they can only hear my humor. 

• The last song you listened to?

Rodney Yates. It’s like… lounge music. I LIKE TO PRETEND I’M SOCIABLE AND AM SITTING IN AN UPSCALE MANHATTAN LOUNGE. FUCK EVERYONE, OK?

• Are you scared of death?

Considering the fact that I spend 90% of my time planning my own death, no? I mean, death will always be a scary thought because it’s the finality of a life (dur), but the other day I was coming home from work and speeding down the road. I had on some great music and I kept going faster and faster and I almost hit a bus. Under normal circumstances, a person should totally be freaked out by this, right? Well, I just thought “and in that moment… I wouldn’t have minded dying.”

Too much Tumblr I guess.

• Most sentimental piece of clothing you own?

This is a pretty good question. But I don’t really think I own anything sentimental, clothing-wise. I mean, I still have my prom dresses - and those were pretty good nights all things considered, so I guess those?

My Questions (answer if I’ve tagged you!):

1. What do you consider an ideal day and why?
2. What are your favorite colors (or color, I only have one too!)?
3. What is your favorite television program?
4. If Meryl Streep asked you to do her laundry for you, would you and why? 
5. Who is you favorite actor and actress (hint: if you don’t say Meryl Streep, you fail this question)?
6. Favorite music genre?
7. IF YOU COULD EAT ANYTHING IN THE WORLD RIGHT NOW, AT THIS VERY MOMENT, WHAT WOULD YOU EAT (URGENT QUESTION REQUIRES CAPS LOCK TO BE SMASHED DOWN)?
8. What hobbies/skills/talents do you enjoy pursuing? Explain them in depth because I am nosy.
9. Do you drink?
10. Do you like peanuts? Why or why not?
11. How fucking difficult was it for you to pick out eleven people to pass this shit on to?