god no wonder sam hated benny so much

he was jealous because benny was the good brother who was always there for dean, like sam thinks he never was

HUMAN CAS IS WHAT I ALWAYS SAID I WANTED

BUT I WAS SO WRONG

THIS ISNT WHAT I WANTED EVERYTHING HURTS I JUST WANT CAS TO BE HAPPY

About the final and why I'm excited for season 9:

Note;  This is mainly a positive post, so if you don’t want to read anything negative, skip the first part. Also, since this turned out to be longer than I thought, I’ll make a completely different post regarding Fallen!Cas and Destiel, and why I think his fall is a good thing. I apologize for all spelling and grammar mistakes

To be honest, I’m more overwhelmed and confused than ever. This is just a post explaining what I liked and what I didn’t like, and why.

First of all, the episode had a lot of positive elements that I’m excited about, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to ignore the things that upset me.  

Things I didn’t like:

•       The killing of the women:

The death of Naomi. Oh, Naomi, Naomi, Naomi. I have to be honest; at first I didn’t like her as a person. I LOVED her as a villain, but I wasn’t quite sure where I had her. However, I’ve always believed there’s no such thing as a completely evil villain, just like there’s no such thing as a completely perfect saint. The world isn’t divided into good people and bad people. That’s just shady and shallow story telling. The same thing goes for characters. I was on guard, because I KNEW we were going to get an emotional Naomi scene. And we did. Then they killed her off, JUST like that. We didn’t even get a death scene. Just BAM  lol, she’s dead. This upsets me. Why? Because we were just beginning to understand Naomi. No, it didn’t make the things she did ‘good’ or ‘right’, but it made us understand WHY she did what she did. We were just beginning to see Naomi for who she was, and that death? Also, the bitch comment. No. Just no.

Jody. Is she dead? Maybe. Maybe not.  The truth is we don’t know. We can’t know and we’ll probably never know (unless they mention her). Someone on tumblr pointed out that she couldn’t be dead because surely they would have shown her death scene, right? Wrong.  Did Linda Tran get a death scene? No. I mean, we didn’t even know she was dead until Kevin confirmed it. Here’s the thing: The writers keep trying to justify the killing of female characters by saying that they ‘died heroes’. I have to admit, Sarah’s death was more than I expected, but here’s the thing: If Crowley had died instead of Naomi he’d gotten a long, emotional death scene (which he almost did). If Kevin had died instead of his mother? Well it would have been a BIG DEAL. Don’t even start with the whole ‘but he’s the prophet and he’s mother isn’t’ argument.  She is a character nonetheless, a character that deserves a death scene. I personally think Jodie is alive, but even then, we DESERVE confirmation.

Abaddon. Holy fuck what even was that, huh? For one thing, I’m THRILLED she didn’t die. I was afraid we were going to get the Eve situation all over again. Remember that? Remember Eve? The badass mother that was going to be the next Lucifer? The next Crowley? The big female villain? Remember how they killed her off with some old, stupid dust? I will never get over Eve. Like Abaddon she had a lot of potential, therefore I was scared Abaddon was going to be another Eve.

Abaddon didn’t die though, but what actually happened to her? We just don’t know, do we? I was so excited for the regime change. While I love Crowley as a villain, I was so ready to see Abaddon be the new badass, the queen of Hell. That didn’t happen. Maybe it’ll happen in season 9? We just don’t know.

•  ‘’… wife and kids’’. To me, Castiel is genderless. The show needs to stop pushing this hetero crap onto a genderless, multidimensional wavelength of celestial intent. And yes, Castiel may not be an angel now- But that doesn’t mean he’s a man! Yes, his sex is male, but I highly doubt he identify as a man simply because he has a penis. He’s still Castiel, so to me he’s still genderless.

• Sam’s speech: First of all, I didn’t find the speech in itself negative. I loved Jared’s performance, and I was enjoying it until Sam criticized Dean for having other relationships. One thing is Benny. I know Sam had issues with Benny, but I honestly thought those were fixed (guess they weren’t). However, he didn’t just say ‘vampire’; He said angels. Angel. As in Castiel. As in their friend. As in (according to Dean) their family? The same Castiel Sam pushed Dean towards in the beginning of the episode (which was a huge thing; I was actually very proud of Sam in that moment). This just doesn’t make sense to me. Now, as a pervious ‘’Sam!girl’’ I was deeply offended. The Sam I know and love wouldn’t guilt trip for having other relationships! What happened to the whole ‘You’re not a grunt’ speech? What happened? To me, it was out of character and it hurt. It hurt because Sam wanted to die, and he basically said it was because he felt Dean didn’t trust him anymore. Because Dean had other friends. However, I chose to close my eyes and sigh, and focus on the good stuff. The speech would have been much better without that comment.
  

Now moving on to the positive things:

• Sam pushing Dean towards Castiel: To me, this was amazing. What he said in the speech was confusing and weird to me, therefore I choose to ignore that, and focus on what he did in the beginning of the episode. Dean leaving Sam alone to work with Castiel was wonderful, and I almost couldn’t believe it happened. My expectations were so incredibly low, and when Dean left I was thrilled. I was proud of him, and proud of Sam. Most of all I was proud of Cas, for coming to Dean and asking him for help.

• The bar scene: I’m glad they talked. I’m glad Castiel explained everything, and I’m glad they worked together. I do feel like it was rushed, but I’m just glad we got that talk. Maybe I should have higher expectations, but that was all I wanted from the finale. Hopefully they’ll deal with everything else in season 9. Magical muser’s post made me love it even more (http://magical-muser.tumblr.com/post/50550141643/so-at-the-bar-dean-is-watching-the-tv-and-then). Also; some people have been pointing out how Metatron assumed Castiel was straight, representing the normal society; where you’re straight until proven otherwise. Then we get the bar scene, where Dean assumes the woman is going to be the bartender’s love and soul mate. However, this is /not/ what happens. To me, this was very important. After all the wank that’s been going on (cons, etc…) I’ve been feeling de-motivated and bitter, but this made me feel better. In fact, after that scene, I’m almost convinced Destiel WILL happen.

• Crowley: I don’t even know what to say about him. First of all; You get an A+ for performance, Mark Sheppard. To be honest, I was very conflicted when it came to Crowley. I didn’t want him to be the king of Hell anymore. I didn’t necessarily want him to die, but I wanted SOMETHING to happen. Like I said, I wanted a regime change. Maybe it’ll happen in season 9. Again, we don’t know. What we do know, however, is that there is something going on with Crowley. What is he? What is his agenda? Who is he? WE thought we knew, but it turns out we don’t. And I’m excited about that. We saw a new, better side of Crowley, and I want MORE! Hopefully we’ll see more in season 9.

• Plot: Plot wise this episode was one of the best episodes of the season. It was confusing, weird, exciting and heartbreaking. I expected Metatron to be a liar, I expected Cas to ‘fall’, I expected Naomi to die- but I never expecting it to happen the way it did. I didn’t expect Dean to go with Cas, I didn’t expect Abaddon, Crowley and Kevin to survive, but what surprised me the most was the last scene. The angels fell. Just like that. I honestly never expected it to be this huge, and this significant. This important. Season seven’s final  (the final, not the other episodes, jesus Christ) was pleasing and frustrating, but it wasn’t MIND BLOWING. I haven’t been this excited about the plot since season five, which to me, was the best spn season. Like many people I expected a lot from season 8, but it didn’t feel quite like this. Season 6 and 7 were horseshit, and it takes time to build up a show again. So to me, season 8 was a way to get back on track. Which is why I expect season 9 to be wonderful and mind blowing. I also feel like season 9 is going to be a great season mythology wise, which is very important to me. Don’t misunderstand me, I love the characters, but the show is nothing without its unique mythology. Think of what this means for Heaven (and Hell, for that matter). In season 6, there was a civil war going on in Heaven, which we barely even only got a few glances of. In season 7 it was like Heaven didn’t even exist. In season 8 we didn’t even know what Heaven was anymore, all we saw was Naomi’s office. Everything that was told came from unreliable sources. I’m excited to see what they’re planning to do with Heaven, and how that will affect earth. How will it affect hunters? Did every single one of the angels fall? Do they still have their memory? Is Metatron all alone in Heaven? Is Heaven going to be shut down forever? I don’t know about you guys, but I’m pretty stoked. My expectations are VERY high right now.      
  

For the first time in a long time, I’m positive. I’m happy, excited and so proud of supernatural for pulling us up from the land of lazy, half assed plot lines. Your move, Jeremy :)

Dean worried. It gnawed at his stomach and fought with the bitter amber liquid in a battle to see what made him more anxious and nauseous. He shouldn’t have allowed himself to, not with the angel tablet free and the mountains of old scrolls and texts his brother (not so secretly) fawned over with curiosity.

Dean sent a murmur of “fresh air” towards Sammy who merely nodded before trekking outside, the collar of his jacket upturned slightly to fight the chill. He dug in his worn jeans for his phone and pulled it out, nearly dropping it in the process. Damn those phones. He thumbed down the list of names until he reached the C’s. Cass.

Would he answer? Would he appear, still on the phone with Dean, but a smirk on his face because he knew it had become a game to them? The debate didn’t last long enough for Dean to regret it and he pushed the “call” button. He held it to his ear, the rings echoing and only furthering the build of anticipation in his stomach. The voice mail began to place and Dean frowned. He hung up and tried again. Nothing. 

Dean shook his head to clear the bloody, painful scenarios that played in his brain. The last time he saw his friend, the angel didn’t look so hot. Even at his weakest, Cas was a severe thunderstorm in the middle of May; the kind where the tree limbs beat against the ground and the rain can bruise pale skin. With a huff, he decided to pray. 

“Oh Captain, my Captain. Cas, buddy, you out there?” He let the still air surround him, burying him further in the pit of worry. “I pray to thee Castiel that he at least give me a sign he’s okay.” Still, like Dean hadn’t expected, nothing like those dark nights in that desolate place.

Maybe, just maybe, Dean wasn’t a few feet from Sammy or a working shower; maybe he never found Benny, or Cas, or found a way out of Purgatory. Maybe Dean was asleep, still singing that same mantra to an angel he never found.