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i can’t think of a more beautiful, touching, wonderful way to end the office. greg wrote an amazing episode that made us feel like it was okay to let go of the characters. we can let them go because they will all be okay. they all have grown and have found their way. they are all moving in different directions but they love and appreciate where they came from. they will always be a family.
thank you, greg daniels.
we know there is going to be another mass effect game, that commander shepard’s story is over, that there are rumors of a javik-centric game, a garrus spinoff, the illusive man…
but don’t you think that there’s also an opportunity here to reinvent shepard’s legacy? to set the game far into the future, when the shepard is a status, a title, for heroes of space; when you’re not a commander but a shepard-commander. you run into urdnot mordin, one in a long line of urdnot mordins; maybe a vakarian or a krios. descendants, thoroughly different from the figures—the friends—we already know, to reclaim and recreate and rediscover the galaxy we only thought we knew. and artifacts, memories, memorials, of the heroes we fought alongside; that history which is our history, which means so much to us. we’d have just the barest echoes of it, the ripples we cast hundreds of years ago still felt among the stars, faded, but still felt.
and it would allow for advanced gameplay mechanics to represent the advanced technology. asking the same questions in new ways; what humanity means, what artificial intelligence is, and how do we define family on a galactic scale?
so it would take that story, grandpa and grandkid, and give it context, meaning, applicability. we’d get a statue of mordin solus on a tuchanka barely recognizable, thriving, alive; and a garrus vakarian, wrought of steel on palaven; and the preserved citadel museum; and the new wave of geth; and shepard-commander, the next generation; ssv-normandy enterprise… that kind of continuity.
it would be cool.
Sometimes I remember the kinds of men who have been in Ziva’s life and that she looked at Tony when remembering her father’s words about one day “dancing with a man who deserves your love.” Because she’s been with a lot of men who haven’t been deserving. AT ALL.
And that this same man who deserves her calls her his “best friend”?
That’s when I realize I should just sit back and enjoy this journey because it can’t be any clearer where it’s headed.
Finite Late Night
Believe me when I say,
that I miss
how you filled the space
between my lips
that spoke of affection
it was the first time I’ve felt it
you bridged the gaps
between my knuckles
my weathered palms
that had held
one too many teary nights
of better nights to come
you never did deliver
I’ve been in a weird place lately. I’ve talked about it a bit on here. Tonight, I had dinner with my friend whom I haven’t seen in a while and I just talked and talked. Told her everything that was going on, everything that I was worried about, things I am working on, plans I have. I also told her about this blah feeling that I have been having. This feeling of almost nothing. The weird thing is that it isn’t a bad nothing, in a way, it’s a peaceful nothing.
I am so used to being very happy or very sad. almost bipolar, although not to that extreme. I do feel like I have the tendency to obsess over things whether good or bad and for the first time that I can remember, I am not doing that. I am not obsessed about my husband and making him love me or obsessing over finding every bit of proof that he was cheating on me and then not doing anything about it and obsessing that I was an idiot for not doing it. I am not obsessed about him having a baby and am really enjoying that beautiful little baby who is my daughter’s sister. I am not obsessing about my weight. I know I need to work on it more, but I like food. It makes me happy and I know I will figure out the balance. I am not obsessing over exercise and making sure that I go every second that I can, I am not obsessing over internet relationships. I have no control over what happens in other people’s lives. No matter how much I wish someone lived close, it’s just not my reality. I am not pretending that a skype relationship makes me happy, because it doesn’t and I just don’t want something that is a fantasy. I am not checking tumblr and facebook obsessively. I am reading more and I can actually concentrate for more than 5 minutes. I am not obsessing over dating guys because I think I should be or because I just want to have sex (although, that wouldn’t be a bad thing :P). I am not worried so much about work because my brain is clear from all the above clutter to be able to do a better job.
I thought that I was going through some sort of depressive episode, but I am beginning to see that it is not. It is normal. I was truly missing the extreme feelings that I usually feel, but I think I am getting a respite. I of course always go back to all things Broadway and I keep thinking of Diana singing “I Miss the Mountains” in Next to Normal. I get it, and that scares me a bit. I have to remind myself that this is a good thing. Not having the highs and lows have made me a better mom, midwife, sister and friend.
I have such good things going on right now. If I meet someone, great, if not, I’ll go on my adventures and live my life. It’s really a pretty awesome life and I am just going to enjoy it.
Remind me of this post when I start obsessing over something in the future:)
Episode reaction/recap for Advanced Introduction to Finality. I’m also explaining why I don’t have a problem with evil!Jeff/evil!Annie. (Warning: long. And image heavy.)
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Welcome to the trip, man
Clicking on the Orphan Black tag on Tumblr and reading theories, especially those written by non-scientists, has become my new favorite pastime. And I don’t mean for that previous statement to sound in any way condescending. I’m an immunologist by training, so naturally I find it encouraging that non-scientists, especially young women, have latched onto this show and found a forum for discussion. I think the best compliment I can pay Orphan Black is that not only has it gotten people talking; it’s what the show has gotten people talking about. What sets the Orphan Black fandom apart, in my opinion, is that the fans aren’t just having the predictable post-show discussions revolving around simple plot synopsis or the characters’ wardrobe choices or their favorite (potential) couples. Granted, those discussions are happening, but they’re happening as almost second fiddle to discussions about the scientific questions generated by the show. The more I read, the more compelled I am to write. I also find myself making observations about the nurture side of the nature vs. nurture debate. As I discuss the show with my friends (many of whom were once my fellow graduate students), the tone of our discussions has taken a turn towards the philosophical and sociological.
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okay about the s4 finale
mabekah. they are so cute!!! rebekah is so pretty and she’s so happy and I found myself smiling when she beamed so genuinely :)
stefan. when stefan is sad, my heart is torn in shreds. :( and now he’s locked at the bottom of the river. no. I can’t accept that. please. stefan does not deserve that fate!!!
someone help him!!! :(((
bonnie. wrong decisions honey :( bonnie sacrificed a lot, she also doesn’t deserve her fate. she’s too good a person to remain dead. no. :(
and then klaroline.
klaroline. lovely. and perfect. their scene is a promise that their love will be the endgame.
oh and their last scene together? walking away? together? arms in arms? smiling? and happy? and that music? the musiiiic T.T
I can’t. I just can’t. T.T too much feels. not gonna say anything anymore. my words aren’t enough. they are just too perfect.
for good friends & good runs
today, my boss BFF mentioned that her parents lived in SC. we got to talking about that place & i ended up telling her about my plans to almost move there. how i had a job & apartment & movers & within a week of my relocation, things went kaput with ex. she kept repeating that something like that would be so devastating. that word, devastating. and as i told her all about it, probably for the first time in a long time, i didn’t cry or get upset - it’s just something that’s part of my story now [although it will never define me, i honestly wouldn’t have ended up in new york otherwise. at least right now, so it is part of the story]. and i guess, looking back it was devastating, but the good thing about being human is you don’t focus on that at the time…you just go into survival mode. you move day-by-day. step-by-step until things become okay again. and things are okay again. they are better than okay, actually.
so when boss BFF asked me “how the hell did you get over that?? i would have died” i wish i could have said that i was OMG so strong and a SURVIVOR! (cue destiny’s child music) and i rose up from that mess like a phoenix or some other weird ass bird to become a new, fantastic badass bitch. but really, the past few months have been amazing thanks to good friends (including all of you, there will never been enough words to say how much you tumblr girls helped) and good runs. and right now, that’s really all i need…..plus a glass of wine, of course.