Remember that thing i did that made me so happy?

i want to do it again.  i tried to do it again but sorta failed bc i wasn’t fast enough and bc the race directors wouldn’t let me. (this is where i would put a link to that post about the chicago race if i wasn’t a dumbass who deactivated that acct, facepalm)

my doctors dont like it either. but i HAVE TO DO IT. So i keep trying to start again. and i keep failing.  but i want it.

all i got out of myself was a mile tonight.  one measly mile.  and it was at a record slow pace.  and it was full of physical pain and i watched the distance counter in agony getting to the mile mark.  my plan was 5 miles.  but even though i failed to do what i asked of myself…. it’s the kinda failure that motivates.  So tomorrow i might just do one measly mile again but you bet your ass i’ll do that shit faster.

i NEED to be able to do this again.  i have so much to prove.  maybe just to myself.