MARAUDERS PERSONAL CANON.
He shows up at the Potters’ front door with one small bag one rainy night, soaked from head to toe. He hears laughter coming from the dining room and he stands frozen, with his finger millimeters from the doorbell. One buzz and James is at the door and Sirius takes one look at him and nearly loses all semblance of control. James knows immediately what is wrong. Wordlessly, he embraces him and pulls him inside, simply telling his parents that Sirius would be staying with them for a while.
He has nightmares where he wakes up in the middle of the night while he’s at school and he has to double check the beds to make sure James, Remus and Peter are sleeping soundly and didn’t leave him in the middle of the night. In the morning he plasters on a smile and pretends he hasn’t been tossing and turning but James clasps a hand onto his shoulder at breakfast and calls him flea-brain or some other nickname and the smile becomes real.
The first time he sees Harry grown up he can’t believe that he’s real. Every single time after that he has to mentally berate himself into remembering that Harry isn’t James, he’s just a kid. But all he wants to do is laugh about the time he gave Peeves a love potion or some other time where they lost Gryffindor an obscene amount of points and he can’t, because Harry doesn’t have those memories. He’s not James but Sirius swears that every time he sees Harry smile it’s like his best friend is with him again.
He first visits Hogwarts a few months before the school year with his parents, meeting with Dumbledore and discussing the logistics of the Whomping Willow. It’s strange to meet a wizard so great and yet so accepting as the headmaster and Remus is grateful to attend the school. On the first day, he pretends to be just like any other first-year, seeing the school for the first time and he bonds quickly with his dorm mates. But every month as the full moon approaches, that anger he represses so well of not being normal comes back. He hates himself for feeling this way.
James, Sirius and Peter were among the first people who didn’t look upon him as some sort of monster. Even his own parents had been horrified at his condition, so much so that the terrible secret tore Remus apart. They catch him off guard and he can’t come up with another suitable excuse (he had used the sick aunt one just last month) and the truth comes spilling out. But instead of turning their backs on him like he expects, the three just grin excitedly, asking him a million questions. He smiles, the happiest he’s ever been.
He stays away from Harry for more than a decade, not because he doesn’t want to get to know him but because it’s too hard after everything that has happened. Then Dumbledore offers him the position at Hogwarts and he accepts, doing it both as a favor to the headmaster and as a way to work up his courage and finally meet James and Lily’s son. They’re on the train and he sees the boy for the first time, but it’s not his scar that gives Harry away it’s his eyes. They are Lily’s eyes and he flashes back to the time he confirms her suspicions he’s a werewolf and she simply hugs him and fixes his tie. Unfailing kind, Lily Evans was, and over the course of the years he sees that that trait lives on in Harry. It makes him wonder what could’ve been and what would’ve been if Lily and James had lived and raised Harry. For a boy who had grown up without love, his capacity to do just that was astounding. In the end, it isn’t about how much Harry’s smile resembles his father’s or how much his eyes remind Remus of Lily’s, it is the fact that even in the darkest of hours, he has their kindness, generosity and hope.
He wants to save the world but doesn’t know if he’s good enough. He knows he’s good at school but he never tries particularly hard and it isn’t until he manages to become an Animagus that he knows he can be great. He knows they did it for Remus, but a part of him did it for himself.
Lily Evans has slapped him a number of times before fifth year and he taunts her to get her attention. It’s sick and masochistic but that is the only semblance of contact he will get from her so he does it to spite himself. But it isn’t a slap that makes him grow up, it is the first time he saw her crying after their O.W.L.S. in fifth year— after the big fight with Snape. He spends all of sixth year at a distance and never tells her he caught her in such an emotional state. Instead he carries that moment as a reminder to never be cruel to her. He hates seeing her cry.
When he’s notified of his Head Boy status, James sends an owl to Lily filled with polite words and a congratulations. As the weeks pass, she thinks he’s a great listener but it’s only because his throat closes up every time she’s around him, a handicap that he slowly outgrows. They become friends and every time she accidentally brushes against him on their nightly duties he has to repeatedly clench his hands to keep himself from telling her how he really feels and ruining any semblance of friendship they have.
She figured out Remus was a werewolf on her own (the Marauders weren’t the subtlest bunch). And when he confirmed it, she didn’t flinch or make a horrified face. She gave him a hug and fixed his loose tie.
One of the best presents she ever received was Christmas of seventh year when James gives her a crumpled box with a snow globe of Hogwarts, charmed so that the snow never stopped. Hogwarts was her everything and that globe served as a reminder of her favorite memories on the castle grounds.
She doesn’t say yes at first when James asks (well, more demands) her to marry him. Being stuck an in Egyptian tomb with dirt on her face isn’t really a girl’s idea of the perfect proposal, but three months into being with him, she already knew she would.
PETER PETTIGREWHe’s sorted into Gryffindor, not because he is particularly brave or particularly smart or particularly loyal. The Sorting Hat takes pity on him— a boy so desperate to belong. It sees that he is easily influenced and hopes that by placing him among those who are strong and brave and loyal, those qualities will rub off on him. For shortest of whiles, it seems to work.
He takes up a job at an apothecary after graduating from Hogwarts, not really with any sort of goals or anything like the sort. The others want to travel the world, to learn. He’s apathetic about it all and spends more and more time hiding in his Animagus form. Because it’s then that he doesn’t need to think, where he can let the rat’s mind take over and just hide. The owls from Remus (and James to a degree) get more and more infrequent. It’s his own fault really; he never had anything to say to him and so he lets the unanswered post pile up. Sirius never bothered much.
While he’s living as Scabbers, Peter Pettigrew ceases to exist for weeks on end. There will be moments and flashes of his past life but for the most part he is just a rat, living off of what Ron feeds him, scurrying and lounging. The most human he is is when he tells himself he did what he had to do to survive, that he did what anyone else would have done, but he’s just lying to himself. He knows that James and Sirius and Remus would never have done what he did if the situation were reversed and it’s why he doesn’t like it when Harry looks at him— it’s like Jamesknows. He wants to be invisible, but he can’t, so he just lets the rat inside him take over again. Each stretch of time becomes longer and longer and soon he isn’t Peter Pettigrew. He’s just Wormtail, nothing more.
26. One night, about two months before that fateful Halloween, James wrote a letter to Lily.
It’s probably near midnight now, but I can’t sleep for some reason, and I felt like I needed to write you a letter.
You’re lyingright next to me, and our Harry is tucked in your arms. We were trying to make him fall asleep, and you were singing that Muggle lullaby to him— that song that he loves so much— Hush, Little Baby, I think? What a silly song— what sort of baby would want a mockingbird? Papa would much rather buy him a racing broom. But anyway, it makes Harry giggle, and it never fails to make him sleepy, so it’s all right. (Not to mention the fact that I like listening to you sing, so I can’t really complain.) Harry fell asleep pretty fast; he was really hyper today, so I guess the poor baby was worn out. You were, too; you fell asleep right after he did.
It’s September 1st. In ten years, our little baby will be eleven and off to Hogwarts— can you imagine that, Lily? We’ll be standing there on Platform 9 3/4 together, kissing his forehead and hugging him and waving to him and bursting with pride.
And look at us, Lils. Remember this day, ten years ago? It was the first time I ever met you. I don’t think you liked me very much back then, although I can’t imagine why. Only teasing, darling, you know better than anyone what an annoying little arrogant toerag I was.
Blimey, Lils, I can’t even remember or imagine what my life was like before I met you. Merlin forbid Sirius ever hear me say this, or he’ll think I’ve gone bloody soft in the head, which I probably have, but you are my life. I don’t know who I would be, or where I would be, or how I could even be alive without you.
I love you more than anything the world, Lily, more than I love life itself.
But Lily, there’s a war out there, and it’s only getting worse and worse every day. I know you’re worried, and I’m worried too. So I’m going to put this letter somewhere in the back of our bookshelf, probably behind those old and completely useless spellbooks that you refuse to throw out.
It hurts so much to even think of the possibility of leaving you here alone in this world, but if it ever happens, maybe you’ll be cleaning one day and find this letter from me, and I’ll feel better knowing that you’ll know just how much I love you and Harry, and you’ll give him a kiss for me and tell him that Daddy loves him.
And I love you, Lily.
Lily never found the letter.
001: Tonks waited with Teddy during his first full moon, just to check that everything was fine.
When the sun came up, and Remus changed back into himself, Tonks took Teddy to see him. She didn’t want Teddy to grow up without an understanding of what his father went through every month. Remus was exhausted, but he stayed awake for hours to play and laugh with his son.
- When he was seven, he remembers running, and running, and running. He doesn’t stop, until he trips, and the only thing running through his mind was, “If you loved me enough, or if you cared, even just a little, you wouldn’t even think of making me live with her.”
- His favorite color is turquoise, and it doesn’t escape his notice that Hermes wore a turquoise bracelet during the first, and only, time they met.
- He loves Star Wars, and when Darth Vader says, “Luke, I am your father”, he hopes that Hermes were cool enough to say those words as he claims him.
- While reading a book on ancient Greek, he finds out that Luke comes from the word leucos, meaning ‘bright’, but remembers that May named him Luke because of her wolf fascination. He is disappointed, but this wasn’t the first time she made him feel this way…
- … and after all these years, he is still not used to it.
- The mere thought of killing people makes him feel sick to the core, but it’s what he has to do. Luke has never regretted anything in his life, but he guesses that there’s always a first time for everything; it’s what he signed up for, after all.
- He thinks of Chris, of Travis and Connor, his siblings, and the undetermined demigods in Cabin Eleven. He’s doing this for them, because they deserve more than symbols floating above their heads, and he believes that someday, they’ll be a family again, a family that he, and everyone else, can be proud of. He feels weak, but the tug brings him back to his thoughts, and a few seconds later, he comes out of the water, and the ghost of Achilles shakes his head in disapproval, knowing that another man has a fate as cursed as his.
- “Your eyes. They’re— they’re blue.” Percy looks at him, green eyes meeting blue, and he knows that he’s forgiven. He knows that Percy will keep his promise. With that, he closes his eyes, embracing the death that was predestined for him more than seventy years ago.
- The funeral is grand, grander than he expected, and his body is wrapped in a turquoise shroud, adorned with the same feathers as Hermes’ talaria. He sees Percy standing by the corner, holding Annabeth close, and Thalia — oh gods— he never thought that he’d see her this weak.
- Hermes kisses his forehead, giving him his final blessing, and when he mutters ‘farewell’, Luke says goodbye to the father he never knew. He waits in Elysium, waving his hand over the Iris message, his last link to the mortal world.
Personal canon: back in Wonderland, when she was by herself, Cora used to take on Regina's form, stand in front of a full-length mirror...
… and just talk to her Regina-shaped reflection for hours about magic and governing and husbands. And Cora would tell Regina how much she loved and missed her, and how they would be together again one day soon, and Regina would just smile and repeat her words, the obedient, submissive daughter that she never was.
Personal Canon: Narcissa Malfoy
Requested by @zombie-boogie.
1. She never asks why she’s named for a flower instead of a star. When she’s a child, of course, she doesn’t realize. Just thinks of ‘Bellatrix’ and ‘Andromeda’ as syllables tricky for a young mouth to wrap around, isn’t conscious of their celestial implications. She settles on ‘Bella’, which is obvious, and ‘Meddy’ because Andy is a boy’s name and really, what was their mother thinking — there’s no good nickname for Andromeda.
Later in life, of course, she realizes. Names have power, names happen for a reason. They’re whispered to expectant mothers on the wind, in birdsong, through the light patter of rain on windowpanes. As Bella and Meddy rocket off into the night in opposite directions, tearing the family apart, exactly the gleaming, brilliant lights they were always destined to be, Cissy wraps herself around her husband, garlands their home as best she can. She doesn’t have the drive her sisters have. She doesn’t have the conviction. She’s an ornament, not a star.
2. Bellatrix comes back from Azkaban different. Meddy’s long gone, and for the first time Narcissa is glad of it. Despite their differences, despite their political headbutting, Meddy and Bella always loved each other intensely. Narcissa is glad Meddy will never see Bella like this.
Narcissa has often been told she is the most beautiful among her sisters, a statement sometimes flattering but usually awkward. She usually thinks the people who say it have short memories; when they were young, she always felt Bella was the beautiful one, with heavy-lidded eyes and the Black family hair (rich night-dark, thick and wavy — Cissy’s dishwater blonde was a dull mess until she bleached it with a household charm). But now… Narcissa feels as though she’s looking at the ruin of an ancient temple. The mouldings are there, the foundation is the same, but the marble has cracked and thinned and grown sallow with time. Narcissa is afraid.
Bellatrix looks at her with cold eyes set deep in a death’s head. “I’m very hungry, Cissy,” she says, glancing about and jittering as though having a nervous fit. “They didn’t feed us well, you know. They didn’t feed us well at all.” She starts to laugh, a shrill cackling sound, and then she reaches out to lay a bony hand on Narcissa’s shoulder. “We fed them.”
3. “So what, Narcissa, you think you can just walk back into my life after twenty years and just act like everything’s the same?”
“Meddy, I just wanted to—”
“Nothing is the same, Narcissa. Nothing.”
“We’re the only ones left,” Narcissa says, and her voice breaks on the final word, and she looks at her sister and doesn’t know what to do. Doesn’t know how to feel, how to breathe.
Andromeda laughs, and it’s a terrible sound, rage and loss and a deep all-suffusing pain. “You are the only one left. You. I’m fairly certain my name’s blasted off that wall. I’m fairly certain my daughter — my daughter — never even graced the tree. I’m fairly certain—”
“They put her in the ground, Cissy! They put her in the ground and I watched it, and nothing can bring her back. There is nothing you can give me!” Andromeda takes a moment to stride past Narcissa, to throw open the closet doors. Hogwarts robes, and a yellow scarf, and little dresses with badger designs embroidered into them. “Nothing. I have nothing left but scars and all the things I sewed for her when she was a little girl and a bed that’s supposed to fit me and a husband, but there’s never going to be a husband in it again. What on Earth could you give me?”
“A sister,” Narcissa says.
Andromeda narrows her eyes. “I don’t have any sisters.”
It stings, but Narcissa knows she’s got no right to protest this. “Then maybe… maybe a friend.”
1) Lily and James didn't plan to have Harry
In fact, Lily was scared shitless when she found out she was pregnant. At nineteen and fighting in a wartime resistance organization, a baby was the last thing she wanted—hell, it was the last thing she needed. News of her pregnancy came in the form of dark blue liquid in a small, glass vial. This same vial soon found itself smashed into a thousand pieces after Lily threw it against the bathroom wall. She was far from glowing, or fantasizing about nursery designs or baby names. No, Lily was curled up into a tiny ball in her bed, crying for the remainder of the evening. How could she justify bringing a baby into the world at a time like this? Telling James was another challenge, which brought on another round of sobbing and gasping for air. Her throat was swollen, hair was askew, and her makeup was running in long, wet trails down her face; essentially, she looked a bit of a mess. James’ eyes kept glancing at Lily’s stomach in disbelief as he rubbed her back in what he hoped were comforting circles. He told her that everything was going to be okay, that they’d sort it out, to breathe, but the fact that he was reassuring himself as much as her wasn’t lost upon him. When the cries finally subsided, replaced with the occasional sniffle, Lily voiced her options. She acknowledged that terminating the pregnancy was the most reasonable way to go, and James supported her decision.
Days passed, very stressful days full of headaches and vomit, and while terminating the pregnancy still seemed like the best option, something was nagging her. This something couldn’t be explained, but the idea it presented was “fucking rubbish” to Lily at the time: Maybe she could continue with the pregnancy. To her, this wasn’t at all practical, and there were far more cons than pros as an outcome. However, the more viable the alternative appeared, the more she felt as if she could do it. It would be a challenge, it would be dangerous, and it would temporarily change her role in the Order. Nevertheless, she’d be damned if a pregnancy could truly stop her from fighting. Fighting for what was right wasn’t just about wands and duels, after all. It was about changing hearts and minds above all else. And as much as she loathed the saying, she did believe that things happen for a reason sometimes. It wasn’t ideal—it was so very far from ideal—but she felt an odd sense of empowerment at the idea of juggling the tribulations of pregnancy and helping with a resistance that meant the world to her.
So Lily decided to continue with the pregnancy, and while the idea of being a mother so young in life never failed to scare her, she marched on.
NED/CATELYN haha middle aged married people sex
omg … literally have never thought of their relationship without being forced to by the narrative, not sure why
HERE WE GO
Ned’s the big spoon because winter is coming and Cat is smaller than he is so how is that economic in terms of warmth if she were the big spoon? Exactly. Also, honor dictates that he must be on the outside should something attack.
Both of them are morning people because winter is coming and they must rise early to prepare.
Cat would be loud. Honor would dictate that Ned would not disturb the slumber of others. Winter is coming, but silently.
I think they’d spend a lot of time talking about the Stark kiddies in their rare alone time. And it would be adorable.