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can you imagine how confused the first girl to get her period must have been

i would literally rip out my uterus and burn it in a fire if i had the chance

these cramps are actually getting ridiculous. seriously mother nature? i could actually text you every month guaranteeing you that im not pregnant. do we have a deal?

When I'm on my period

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  • Me: fuck I hate my period
  • Me: YES NO MORE OF THAT SHIT FOR ANOTHER MONTH
  • Me: …
  • Me: …
  • Me: Where the fuck is my period
  • Me: omg what if I’m pregnant
  • Me: I’ve never had sex but I am definitely pregnant
  • Me: Shit I’m the next Virgin Mary
  • Me: Should I get a pregnancy test
  • Me: Should I tell my parents
  • Me: WAIT
  • Me: I DO NOT WANT A CHILD
  • Me: WHERE THE FUCK IS MY PERIOD
  • Me: YOU BETTER GET HERE QUICK YOU MOTHERFUCKER
  • Me: IF YOU DON’T GET HERE IN THE NEXT WEEK WE’RE GOING TO HAVE TROUBLE
  • Uterus: hi
  • Me: THERE YOU ARE
  • Me: WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN
  • Me: DO YOU KNOW HOW WORRIED I’VE BEEN
  • Me: DON’T EVER DO THAT AGAIN YOU SHITHEAD
  • Me: …
  • Me: fuck I hate my period
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