Okay, Tumblr, we have a few days to go so I’m going to break it to you gently. 

 It is St Patrick’s Day, it is Patrick’s Day or, most commonly, it’s Paddy’s Day. 

It is not Patty’s Day

It is not Patty’s Day.

IT IS NOT PATTY’S DAY.

If you say Patty’s Day, i’m just going to go ahead and assume that you have never actually met an Irishman or -woman before and that you are so far removed from Irish heritage that it’s turned into Chinese whispers at this stage.

He’s our patron saint. He brought Christianity to Ireland. He drove out the snakes. He was Welsh. He had that gig with the shamrock. We celebrate it with parades and marching bands and green-coloured vomit on Grafton Street. We celebrate it in English. We celebrate it in Irish. We are our worst national stereotype on this day and, apparently, we encourage everyone in the world to join in national drunkening day but it is not, and never will be, Patty’s Day. 

Now, Lá Fhéile Pádraig, y’all.