“But sometimes we get sad about things and we don't like to tell other people that we are sad about them. We like to keep it a secret. Or sometimes we are sad and we don't really know we are sad. So we say we aren't sad. But we really are.”
—Mark Haddon, The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time
Tony wasn’t sure how or when it happened, but somewhere between a horrifying conversation with Thor and the three month anniversary of ‘Amorapocalypse’ (as Barton liked to call it) he found something his room.
Something weird.
Tony was pretty well-acquainted with weird. Weird was walking into the living room to find Natasha holding Steve in a headlock with her thighs. It was Clint sticking Bruce in the ass with his ‘viagrarrows’ (seriously, that name was never going to take off) to trigger his transformation whenever he wanted a good cardio workout. Because being chased by a limping Hulk with a hard-on was apparently how he got his kicks.
I’m supposed to be on a bloody break
