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“Carry on down there about three five miles until you come to the gimpy child with the hula hoop. Keep an eye on him he's a contrary fucker! You never know what way he's gonna left next! Keep going until you come to a graveyard! With a hen it it! And if that hen is looking at you, and I mean STRAIGHT FUCKING AT YOU... you may as well come home. You'll have no luck today. What the fuck are you going to Offaly for anyway?”—Tommy Tiernan on Irish giving directions.
Barack Obama is in Ireland
- Enda Kenny presented Barack with a hurl.
- Barack threatened to “paddle” and members of Congress who misbehave with the hurl. ahdgsajfghj
- Then he went to a village called Moneygall, which is in Offaly, the same county as I live in. :D
- He has some distant relatives in Moneygall.
- Him and Michelle spent hours there today meeting people there. People were handing him babies and everything. :L
- They went into the local pub and had some Guinness.
- Apparently Michelle pulled two pints. EPIC.
- They then returned to Dublin, where Obama made a speech.
- I GOT CHILLS.
- HE IS A LIVING LEGEND AND I LOVE HIM.
- ALSO, I WOULD GO LESBIAN FOR HIS WIFE.
- IS FEIDIR LINN.
That is all.
Edit: I forgot to say that when Obama was shaking hands with people after his speech, he shook hands with one woman who was on the phone. She handed the phone to him and he talked to whoever was on the line. MOTHER OF GOD THAT LUCKY BASTARD.
And I’m done.