“When I came back into Room 5, the mom was acting guilty, like I had just caught her doing something. When she left to go take her kid to xray, I checked the drawer, and all the bandaids and ointment packets were missing. So, I called xray and told them to put her in Room 6 when they came back - then I emptied out Room 6's drawer completely and put a plastic spider in it.”

—

My nurse has a divine sense of retribution.

(I would’ve just called security and moved on with my day…. which would’ve just created more paperwork for ME and a slap on the wrist for the patient. Lame.)

“Doc, the teenager in room 3 says he's here because he's addicted to Herbal Essence? Does that make sense to you?”

—

My near-retirement-age nurse, who obviously:

  1. has never heard of herbal INCENSE before, and
  2. uses Herbal Essence(tm) shampoo and other fine hair products

“Chief Complaint: Sprained Ankle Date of Injury: February 30, 2013”

—…and just like that, my nurse earned a bit of teasing from me today. :)
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