“In one experiment, five young mothers were observed interacting with a 6 month old called beth. They smiled at her often and offered her dolls to play with. She was seen as 'sweet,' having a 'soft cry'. The reaction of a second group of mothers to a child the same age, named Adam, was noticeably different. They offered him a train or other 'male' toys to play with. Beth and Adam were actually the same child, dressed in different clothes. ”—Experiment detailed in my sociology textbook to detail the early impression of gender roles.
I want to get a masterlist of every single pronoun, including variations on declinations. Add any new pronouns in the same order below.
Nominative - object - possessive determiner - possessive pronoun - reflexive
To explain what I mean, the pronouns are bolded in the order of the above in the following sentences.
Ne goes to the store to get almond milk for him; nir credit card doesn’t go through but the groceries are his responsibility anyways; ne feels like he doesn’t appreciate nir as much as ne appreciates nirself.
she, her, her, hers, herself
he, him, his, his, himself
they, them, their, theirs, themself
ne, nir, nir, nirs, nirself
jey, jem, jem, jem, jeself
cie, cem, cem, ciez, cieself
it, it, its, its, itself
ce, cem, cez, ce’s, ceself
zie, zim, zir, zir, zimself
ve, vir, vis, vis, virself
xe, xem, xer, xer, xemself
zie, zim, zim, zim, zimself
ne, nen, nir, nes, nenself
nin, nim, nims, nims, nimself
thon, thon, thons, thons, thonself
aei, aeir, aer, aer, aezhself
ey, em, eir, eirs, eirself
xa, xa, xa’s, xa’s, xaself
ze, hir, hir, hirs, hirself
zie, hir, hirs, hirs, hirself
ne, nem, nir, nirs, nemself
"I just don't understand how you can be non-binary-gendered. That is, not female or male."
I want you to lie for me. If you’re a woman, say “I am a man.” If you’re a man, say “I am a woman.” Say it out loud. Say it to your reflection. Do you feel that little disconnect there, where the sentiment you’re articulating doesn’t match up with the reality you experience? You know you’re lying. Even if someone else comes up and says “Hey! That’s right! That’s definitely what you are,” you will still know you’re lying.
I can’t speak for everyone, but that’s what happens to me when I try to place myself as either male or female. I could stand up and say “I am a man,” and know, to my bones, that I was lying. Just as I’d be lying if I said “I am a woman.”
It’s not a matter of thinking, “I can’t be a man/woman if I want to do or like these things.” I know that as a woman, I could still have a career, join the military, roughhouse, be athletic, be great at science – all those stereotypically male things. I know that as a man, I could still stay at home, raise kids, bake, knit, show my emotions easily and often – all those stereotypically female things. My gender identity is not about what I want to do, it’s about who I am.
This is not a new idea. Cultures across the globe have acknowledged more than two genders, from the Middle Kingdom of Egypt to the Lakota of North America, from Mayan civilization to the Siberian Chuckhi. References to persons neither male nor female date back to some of humanity’s most ancient written records, such as the Sumerian creation myth, and survive in seminal religious texts such as the Ramayana and the Halakha.
If you want to learn more, the citation list on Wikipedia’s article on “Third gender” has links and references to scholarly articles, books, studies, and excerpts which might help you get an idea of the nature and history of various non-binary identities. Or you can look at more contemporary accounts, such as Neutrois.com, or the discussion on AVEN’s site on “What it feels like to be trans, genderqueer or genderless”. Remember that no single narrative will be able to represent all people, and different nonbinary people may have different preferred terms, explanations, and experiences.
i find it really ridiculous when cis people complain about trans* people being sexist by dressing in “stereotypically” masculine or feminine ways like gee if you guys hadn’t spent the past several hundred years assigning gender to practically every inanimate object on this earth maybe we wouldn’t have to
charts & gender
I’ve just been kind-of thinking about this for awhile. It’s not that big a deal, I guess, maybe charts are just the least important thing, but I’ve seen quite a few attempts at finding ways to graphically communicate gender. and I’ve never once seen one that got it “quite right.”
I mean, there’s the obvious no-nos,
which could be vastly improved by adding another option or two, or just a “write it in” box. if you’re collecting gender demographics on a survey, I’d say that the best all-round option for your statistical convenience and to not erase anyone is quite simply
(other, please specify: ______ )
I mean, obviously, if it’s a general-population survey, or a survey that does not specifically focus on gender (esp. on trans, genderqueer, nonbinary etc people), the instances of non-binary respondents is probably going to be low enough that, for statistical purposes, this would suit your needs.
but for purposes other than collecting general-population demographics, sometimes it’s nice to chart things out, to show as many options as possible, to see how things interact.
so then, the next step up the rung from the ‘pick one’ with only two options,
It’s an improvement, but it’s still binarist (really, ‘androgynous’ here is just meaning ‘halfway between male and female’ and isn’t exactly outside the binary) and has limited options.
I thought a long time about (and think I have seen) a representation like this:
(NB= nonbinary, N= neutral/ neutrois/ none/ etc)
Again it’s an improvement… a dot can be placed anywhere within the triangle, or floating out in space with the N-camp (and androgynous here is now between three gender groups). It would still not work for everyone, though, and honestly, there’s still something missing. It’s not very nuanced.
My next thought was anything similar but with more sides - a square, for instance - but it gets too complicated deciding where to label different groups. Perhaps a three-dimensional shape would allow a bit more room for more options - but still, with the place-a-dot setup, it’s… limiting. (Multiple dots for genderfluid people is a huge advantage, but still, what if I can’t get my dot the perfect distance between all the right axes? What if a label I’m looking for is just not there?)
Recently I realized that the biggest issue here is that… dots and sliders and checkboxes are really limiting, in general.
You know what isn’t so limiting?
I’ve looked around a bit and so far as I can tell… nobody else has done this? I don’t see why.
of course, there’s plenty of room to add more gender designations along the X axis.
but my favourite part about this is that it allows one to express negative/ anti/ lack of identity. which… might not seem like it’s such a big thing to some people, to a lot of people. I’m sure the majority of people out there would just fill up the M+ or F+ column really high and leave it at that (mostly cis people) ; I have a feeling a lot of trans people would have some positives and some negatives (e.g. maybe a binary trans man would fill in lots of the +M and -F column).
a genderfluid person could do something like
(which, in this case, would be a genderfluid person who never identifies as masculine, and usually identifies as nonbinary, or something?)
my personal chart is something like
Which just… I mean, I really think this visual is a much better description of how I feel, gender-wise, than any one word ever could be, unless I invented a personal word just for myself… that I would have to define to everyone I met anyways, if I wanted it to make any sense. I call myself “agender” because I don’t really see myself as having any gender; as the chart can show, I don’t really have any “positive” gender feelings… but how negative they are is actually pretty important to me.
…sooo, yeah. that’s my thoughts on charting gender. anyone else?