How to Build Emotional Resilience
1. Talk to someone: Sharing how we feel helps to reduce the inner tension (but make sure it is someone who cares about your feelings).
2. Work on improving your self-esteem: Self-esteem is the way you see and feel about yourself … and there are lots of lots of things that undermine our self esteem. For example, experiencing a break up, putting on unwanted weight, doing badly on a test or being excluded by our friends. It’s important that we keep on working on our self-esteem by treating ourselves well and noticing when we succeed (instead of noticing the negatives).
3. Manage your stress levels: If we’re always feelings stressed then it’s hard to cope with life. We tend to over react and have a negative mind set … which drains us of our energy and saps our will to fight. So take a look at your lifestyle and see what you can drop. You may be doing too much, and don’t have time to relax.
4. Make the time and effort to enjoy yourself: Doing things that we enjoy helps to improve the way we feel. So build in little things like having coffee with a friend, or going to a game, or taking time to watch some sports.
5. Choose a healthy life style: Pay attention to your diet and how much you exercise; try to limit alcohol, and don’t deprive yourself of sleep.
6. Develop good relationships: Do your friends make you happy? Do you enjoy their company? Are they kind of people with your best interests at heart? Do they treat you with respect and help to boost your self-esteem? If not, then work on finding new relationships!
How to Deal with Feelings of Social Awkwardness
1. Realize that you’re not the only one. The reality is that most of us worry about the same kinds of things – such as whether others like us, are bored by others, or the kind of impression we’re making.
2. Try to uncover the roots of your anxiety. There may be a variety of reasons for feeling self-conscious, such as having had a bad experience in the past, feeling that you’re with people who are very different from you, or feeling you’re with people who don’t understand you. Also, it may simply be that you’re more introverted so social situations are more stressful for you.
3. Acknowledge the feelings as soon as they arise. That will enable you to start targeting them through positive self talk. For example, remind yourself that: “I always feel like this in these kinds of situations. I’m going to be okay. I usually cope – and I will this time, too.”
4. Fake looking and acting calm, relaxed, and self confident. In time, you’ll find your feelings will change to match the way you appear on the outside.
5. Also, acting warm and friendly helps put others at ease, and encourages them to feel more relaxed around you.
6. Try not to worry about what other people think. In reality, other people will often feel as nervous as you do. It’s just that they’ve learned how to cover it up. Also, some people think negatively about everyone. You’re never going to change this kind of person – and you don’t need their approval anyway!
7. Be kind to yourself. Praise, affirm and reward yourself for deciding to do something that’s difficult for you.
Are you they type of person who gets victimised?
The following questions will help you determine if you’re the type of person who becomes a victim.
1. Do you tend to stay quiet in relationships instead of confidently asking for what you want?
2. Do you feel inadequate on your own, and only feel worthwhile if you are part of a couple?
3. Has a girlfriend or boyfriend, at some point in the past, been able to isolate you from your friends?
4. Are you too much of a people pleaser?
5. Do you desperately want and need to be loved?
6. Do you bury and suppress your anger and resentment?
7. Do you find it hard to say NO to others, and to set and maintain healthy boundaries?
8. Would you describe yourself as being over-responsible?
9. Do you struggle with feelings of false guilt and shame?
10. Do you desperately want to be noticed and affirmed?
11. Do you lose your unique self if in your relationships with others?
12. Do you find hard to disagree with others?
13. Are you the kind of person who takes care of others but doesn’t really take care of themselves?
14. Do you give more than the other person in close relationships?
15. Are you always saying “sorry”; do you tend to assume that everything “bad” is your fault?
16. Are you a bit on the gullible side; are you easily taken in by others?
17. Do you allow other people to squash your spirit, and suffocate your creativity?
18. Do you tend to ignore that nagging inner voice and to blindly hope that everything will be OK?
19. In relationship, do you pretend that any problems “are no big deal” as you’d rather avoid them, than address them properly?
20. Do you tend to forgive too easily?
every time I lose weight and I tell people it’s because of a depression or a med switch they don’t really give a fuck - they just keep on congratulating me
for being mentally ill
for not being able to eat
for not being able to leave the house and buy food
for not having enough money to have food delivered, or be able to pay a shopper
for not being as fat anymore
- If you were abused or anything else happened with your mom, don’t let anyone tell you that you have to love her today, just because she gave birth to you. You should never feel obligated to love someone who hurt you, and you have the right to be upset.
- If you have a good relationship with your mom, awesome. Go tell her Happy Mother’s Day!
“Where the inspirational figure is selected for us, and the gap between their life and ours is too great, the effect is not one of encouragement but of disillusionment - especially if their story is told in terms of personal qualities like bravery or persistence. Knowing a famous person has the same impairment as you can be reassuring, but only in the vague way that hearing of a successful distant relative is reassuring. Most of us will never scale Everest, compete for our country at sports or have a showbiz career. This doesn't mean we've failed.”—
For BBC’s Mental Health Awareness Week, Mark Brown questions the value of glorifying role models who share our own disabilities and pathologies.
A flipside of the same coin to consider is the perilous “tortured genius” myth of creativity, which implies that depression, addiction, and other mental health issues that plagued some successful creators were central to their genius. The human antidotes to this mythology are worthy role models.