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Advice to Young Men from an Old Man

acontinuouslean.com

++ Date:2007-02-15, 9:08AM PST — Advice to Young Men from an Old Man ++

1. Don’t pick on the weak. It’s immoral. Don’t antagonize the strong without cause, its stupid.

2. Don’t hate women. It’s a waste of time

3. Invest in yourself. Material things come to those that have self actualized.

4. Get in a fistfight, even if you are going to lose.

5. As a former Marine, take it from me. Don’t join the military, unless you want to risk getting your balls blown off to secure other people’s economic or political interests.

6. If something has a direct benefit to an individual or a class of people, and a theoretical, abstract, or amorphous benefit to everybody else, realize that the proponent’s intentions are to benefit the former, not the latter, no matter what bullshit they try to feed you.

7. Don’t be a Republican. They are self-dealing crooks with no sense of honor or patriotism to their fellow citizens. If you must be a Republican, don’t be a “conservative”. They are whining, bitching, complaining, simple-minded self-righteous idiots who think they’re perpetual victims. Listen to talk radio for a while, you’ll see what I mean.

8. Don’t take proffered advice without a critical analysis. 90% of all advice is intended to benefit the proponent, not the recipient. Actually, the number is probably closer to 97%, but I don’t want to come off as cynical.

9. You’ll spend your entire life listening to people tell you how much you owe them. You don’t owe the vast majority of people shit.

10. Don’t undermine your fellow young men. Mentor the young men that come after you. Society recognizes that you have the potential to be the most power force in society. It scares them. Society does not find young men sympathetic. They are afraid of you, both individually and collectively. Law enforcement’s primary purpose is to suppress you.

11. As a young man, you’re on your own. Society divides and conquers. Unlike women who have advocates looking out for them (NOW, Women’s Study Departments, government, non-profit organizations, political advocacy groups) almost no one is looking out for you.

12. Young men provide the genius and muscle by which our society thrives. Look at the Silicone Valley. By in large, it was not old men or women that created the revolution we live. Realize that society steals your contributions, secures it with our intellectual property laws, and then takes credit and the rewards where none is due.

13. Know that few people have your best interests at heart. Your mother does. Your father probably does (if he stuck around). Your siblings are on your side. Everybody else worries about themselves.

14. Don’t be afraid to tell people to “fuck off” when need be. It is an important skill to acquire. As they say, speak your piece, even if your voice shakes.

15. Acquire empathy, good interpersonal skills, and confidence. Learn to read body language and non-verbal communication. Don’t just concentrate on your vocational or technical skills, or you’ll find your wife fucking somebody else.

16. Keep fit.

17. Don’t speak ill of your wife/girlfriend. Back her up against the world, even if she is wrong. She should know that you have her back. When she needs your help, give it. She should know that you’ll take her part.

18. Don’t cheat on your wife/girlfriend. If you must cheat, don’t humiliate her. Don’t risk having your transgressions come back to her or her friends. Don’t do it where you live. Don’t do it with people in your social circle. Don’t shit in your own back yard.

19. If your girlfriend doesn’t make you feel good about yourself and bring joy to your life, fire her. That’s what girlfriends are for.

20. Don’t bother with “emotional affairs”. They are just a vehicle for women to flirt and have someone make them feel good about themselves. That’s the part of a relationship they want. For you it is a lot of work and investment in time. If they are having an emotional affair with you, they’re probably fucking someone else.

21. Becoming a woman’s friend and confidant is not going to get you into an intimate relationship. If you haven’t gotten the girl within a reasonably short period of time, chances are you won’t ever get her. She’ll end up confiding to you about the sexual adventures she’s having with someone else.

22. Have and nurture friendships with women.

23. Realize that love is a numbers game. Guys fall in love easily. You’re going to see some girl and feel like you’ll die if you don’t get her. If she rejects you, move on to the next one. It’s her loss.

24. Don’t be an internet troll. Got out and live life. There is not a cadre of beautiful women advertising on Craigslist to have NSA sex with you. Beautiful women don’t need to advertise. The websites that advertise with attractive women’s photos and claims of loneliness are baloney. All they want is your money and your personal information so that they can market to you. The posts on Craigslist by young “women” seeking NSA sex, and asking for a picture are just a bunch of gay troll pic collectors. This is especially true if the post uses common gay lexicon like “hole” as in “fuck my hole” or seeks “masculine” men, or uses the word cock (except in the context of “Don’t send a cock shot.”) There are women on Craigslist. They are easily recognizable by their 2-5 paragraph postings. Most are in their 30′s or older.

25. When you become a man in full, know that people will get in your way. People who are attracted to you will somehow manage to step in your path. Gay guys will give you “the look”. Old people will somehow stumble in front of you at the worst time. Don’t get frustrated. Just step aside and go about your business. Know that these are passive aggressive methods to get you to acknowledge their existence.

26. Don’t gay bash. Don’t mentally or physically abuse people because of who they are, or how they present themselves. It’s none of your business to try to intimidate people into conformity.

27. If your gay, admit it to yourself, your parents, your friends and society at large. Be prepared to get harassed. See rule 14. If someone threatens you or assaults you, call the cops. Have them arrested. You have no obligation to self sacrifice because of who you are. As a gay person, you’ll have more social freedom than straight men. Use it to protect yourself. Be prepared to get out of Dodge if your orientation makes your life unbearable. Move to San Francisco, New York, Atlanta, or New Orleans. You’ll find a welcoming community there.

28. Don’t be a poser. Avoid being one of those dudes who puts a surfboard on top of their car, but never surfs, or a dude with a powder coated fixed gear bike and a messenger bag, but was never a messenger. Live the life. Earn your bonafides.

29. Don’t believe the crap about the patriarchy. More women are accepted and attend college. More degrees are awarded to women than men. Women outlive men. More men commit suicide. Men are twice as likely to be victims of violence, including murder. If you consider sexual assaults in prisons, twice as many men are raped as women (society thinks prison rape is funny). The streets are littered with homeless men, sprinkled with a few homeless women. Statically,women are happier than men. The myth that girls are being cheated by our educational system is belied by the fact that schools are bastions of femininity, mostly run by and taught by women. Girls outperform boys in school. It is the boys in school getting fucked over, and prescribed Ritalin for being boys. Real wages for men are falling, while real wages for women are rising. Just because someone says something enough times, doesn’t make it true. You have nothing to feel guilty about.

30. Remember, 97% of all advice is worthless. Take what you can use, and trash the rest.

a glory of angels

A (not at all comprehensive) guide to the portrayals of angels, from Biblical to comedic, and how to research your friendly terrifying representations of divinity. Please note, I cannot vouch for the quality or reliability of all these sources, this is meant to simply be a compilation.

ORIGINAL SOURCES

FICTION

  • his dark materials trilogy (philip pullman)
  • good omens (terry pratchett and neil gaiman)
  • a wind in the door (madeleine l’engle)
  • the vintner’s luck (elizabeth knox)
  • the glory days (isobelle carmody)
  • daughter of smoke and bone (laini taylor)
  • the space trilogy (cs lewis)
  • angelology (danielle trussoni)
  • skellig (david almond)
  • angel fire series (andrew greely)

MOVIES AND OTHER MEDIA

  • wings of desire (1987)
  • touched by an angel (1994-2003)
  • the prophecy (1995)
  • michael (1996)
  • city of angels (1998)
  • dogma (1999)
  • constantine (2005)
  • supernatural (2005-present)
  • gabriel (2007)
  • legion (2010)

NONFICTION

  • angels in late ancient christianity (ellen muehlberger)
  • from gabriel to lucifer: a cultural history of angels (valery rees)
  • heaven and its wonders and hell from things heard and seen (emanuel swedenborg)

[many thanks to my followers who contributed and this post by dottewa, which helped point me in the right direction when it came to crowley and thelemite literature]

Dear lovely Shinji, please recommend some books that will fit in my backpack and make my world wonderful, or at least change a piece of me.

  • 1984, George Orwell
  • As A Peace Loving Global Citizen, Sun Myung Moon 
  • Autobiography of Red, Anne Carson 
  • Bel Canto, Ann Patchett
  • Beloved, Toni Morrison 
  • The Birth of Tragedy (and Truth and Lying In a Non-Moral Sense), Nietzsche 
  • Bluets, Maggie Nelson 
  • The Book of Disquiet, Fernando Pessoa
  • The Book of Laughter and Forgetting, Milan Kundera
  • The Book Thief, Markus Zusak
  • A Burnt Out Case, Graham Greene
  • The Chronology of Water, Lidia Yuknavitch
  • The Collector, John Fowles
  • A Convergence of Birds: Original Fiction and Poetry Inspired by Joseph Cornell 
  • The English Patient, Michael Ondaatje
  • Flesh and Blood, Michael Cunningham
  • Fugitive Pieces, Anne Michaels
  • The Glass Castle, Jeannette Walls
  • Goose Chase, Patrice Kindl
  • The Heart is a Lonely Hunter, Carson McCullers
  • The History of Love, Nicole Krauss
  • In The Skin of a Lion, Michael Ondaatje
  • Invisible Cities, Italo Calvino
  • Just Kids, Patti Smith
  • Letters to a Young Poet, Rainer Maria Rilke
  • Lolita, Vladimir Nabokov
  • Love in the Time of Cholera, Gabriel Garcia Marquez
  • Macbeth, Shakespeare
  • A Million Little Pieces, James Frey
  • Mrs. Dalloway, Virginia Woolf
  • On Chesil Beach, Ian McEwan
  • The People of Paper, Salvador Plascencia 
  • Perfume: The Story of a Murderer, Patrick Suskind
  • Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking, Susan Cain 
  • Running In The Family, Michael Ondaatje
  • Slouching Towards Bethlehem, Joan Didion 
  • The Tenth Man, Graham Greene
  • The Things They Carried, Tim O’Brien
  • The Tiger’s Wife, Téa Obreht
  • The Unbearable Lightness of Being, Milan Kundera
  • White Oleander, janet Fitch
  • The WInter  Vault, Anne Michaels
  • The Woman in the Dunes, Kobo Abe
  • Written On The Body, Jeannette Winterson 

Ten tips for reducing exam anxiety

  1. Don’t be on tumblr or facebook the night before, the color blue reduces melatonin levels and makes sleeping impossible. Get a good nights sleep! Don’t try to stay up all night by taking caffeine or drugs. You are likely to feel tired, irritable, and distracted by the time of the exam. 
  2. Eat high protein foods before going in but avoid drinks with caffeine.
  3. Panic is contagious, stay far away from your friends who freak out before tests.
  4. Get to the exam room early, so you’ll have time to settle in the environment and feel more at ease with where you are.
  5. Use your imagination and see yourself doing really well in the future, and know it’s partly because you’re going to pass this test.
  6. If you still have time and you get caught up during the test or start feeling anxious, take in a deep breath that goes all the way to the center of your chest and exhale slowly. Repeat.
  7. Do some stretches before taking the exam to increase blood flow and warm up your body. Doing jumping jacks or running in place are a good way to get your heart beat up and your brain ready to solve problems.
  8. Don’t leave the room once you’ve finished the exam. I know you don’t want to be there anymore, but I promise if you look back on your test without doubting yourself then you can find some simple mistakes in spelling, grammar, simple math steps in equations, and so on. 
  9. You don’t have test anxiety because you’re not well prepared, you are well prepared. You’ve studied hard and have payed attention in class just as much as the person next to you. This test is made for you to succeed.
  10. Repeat this over and over in a happy tone, ““I prepared for this test and will do the best I can.”

Find out where to get the most money for your textbooks through here.

The Great Gatsby Soundtrack

1.   100 Dollar Bill - JAY Z

2.   Back To Black - Beyoncé x André 3000

3.   Bang Bang - Will.i.am

4.   A Little Party Never Killed Nobody (All We Got) - Fergie 

5.   Young And Beautiful - Lana Del Rey

6.   Love Is The Drug - Bryan Ferry with The Bryan Ferry Orchestra

7.   Over The Love - Florence + The Machine

8.   Where The Wind Blows - Coco O. of Quadron

9.   Crazy in Love - Emeli Sandé and The Bryan Ferry Orchestra

10.  Together – The xx

11.  Hearts A Mess - Gotye

12.  Love Is Blindness – Jack White

13.  Into the Past - Nero

14.  Kill and Run - Sia

Pre-Order Here

“1. Labyrinths by Jorge Luis Borges (1964) 2. Pale Fire by Vladimir Nabokov (1962) 3. Scaramouche by Rafael Sabatini (1921) 4. Moby-Dick by Herman Melville (1851) 5. Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen (1813) 6. Tales of Mystery and Imagination by Edgar Allan Poe (1836–47) 7. In Search of Lost Time by Marcel Proust (1913–27) 8. Paradise Lost by John Milton (1667) 9. Love in the Time of Cholera by Gabriel García Márquez (1985) 10. The Long Goodbye by Raymond Chandler (1953)”

Michael Chabon lists and discusses his 10 favorite books, part of the same project that gave us the greatest books of all time as voted by 125 famous authors.

Also see Chabon’s ideal bookshelf (along with those of other modern literary icons.)

“What is it about lists that we find so irresistible? As far as I can tell, no one has tried to figure it out (though it’s possible there are psychologists who have solved the mystery, and I just haven’t seen their work). Maybe it has to do with the promise of something both finite and complete, distilling the world down to something you can manage and then be done with. The world is full of photos of cute corgis, but these 37 are the cutest, and once you’ve seen them not only will your day be a little sweeter but you need search no more for cute corgi photos. It could also be the attraction of something easy to read—because it’s broken into small pieces, you know it won’t require too much work to read, you’ll be able to skim it easily, and if you want to read part of it and then stop, you’ll be able to.”

Why we love lists. Better yet, Susan Sontag on the allure of lists.
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