“You can't go on like you're going to start really living one day, like all this is some preamble to some great life that's going to magically appear. I'm a firm believer that you have to create your own miracles. Don't hold out that there's something better waiting on the other side. It doesn't work that way.”
—Perry Moore
“Most human relationships consist mainly of minds interacting with each other, not of human beings communicating, being in communion. No relationship can thrive in that way, and that is why there is so much conflict in relationships. When the mind is running your life, conflict, strife, and problems are inevitable. ”
—Eckhart Tolle
“''It's so important - Every day we wake up, we're creating our memory. We have to create the best ones we can, even if for one day. Find your goals and take them one step at time. Your happiness and control form responsibility. It takes work and you MUST do things yourself. Don't expect anyone else to do it for you. Don't feel sorry for yourself. I've learned that about myself. I once thought I was under the lion's paw but when I decided to take on responsibility, I became much more free.'' ”
—Eddie Vedder
Things I'm learning about life by beginning to date at 27:
Dudes in Chicago loooooooove to do improv. Oh you’re studying at second city #eyerolljerkoff who cares? I feel bad for them, they work so hard for what will ultimately be nothing. (Odds are improv actors are a high ratio on okc because of their hours spent doing improv but whatever. Get a real job unless you’re actually IN second city)
Apartments fascinate me. I’ve seen shithole Humbolt Park one bedrooms with DORM fridges instead of a real refrigerator to stainless steel, high ceilings, hardwood, two bedroom giant condos. Is it bad that a shitty apartment is a turn off? No because it says a lot about you, doesn’t it? How you choose to live. Your environment and what you want around you.
I’m ok with roommates if the place is decent.
Dudes love talking about how much they’re into riding their bike. That’s cool and all but you’re not taking me for a ride on your bicycle for a date are you? It’s not as attractive as you think. I could care less.
Everyone “cool” lives over in Logan Square or Ukrainian Village. Surprising number of dudes in Bridgeport.
Cats. Guys and cats. Anyone else experience this phenomenon? It’s too much. It’s such a turn off. Don’t have a cat. It sicks me out.
Every guy should always have facial hair, just a little scruff is so fucking hot and EASY FOR YOU TO DO. It ups your sex appeal!
Hey assholes, TAKE ME OUT TO DINNER! Christ did no one teach you how to date? My best dates, the guy plans it, picks me up, dinner and drinks. Simple. Classic.
A car is a huge plus. I don’t have one so if he lives far it’s nice having faster access.
Career is a loose term. No one is doing what they wanted to do in college. Those who make lemonade are much more attractive than those perpetually in school and still working a job without benefits.
TEXT ME THE NEXT DAY. Even if it sucked, text me and tell me you weren’t that into me. Dating (or fucking) without a day after courtesy text is rude and low. I’m a catch and I spent time with your sorry ass or allowed your dick NEAR me, at least thank me.
Try for a second or third date maybe? Everyone gives up wayyyy to early. There’s no art of romance. At the same time, don’t waste my time if there’s no spark.
I don’t really have a type. There are guys I’m attracted to instantly but I can usually find something I like in almost anyone. I probably need to be more picky? I’m just so open and optimistic.
I love meeting people and hearing their stories. Sometimes people have a hard time talking though beyond the whatdoyoudo/whereareyoufrom/tellmeaboutyourfamily initial chatter. Have stories ready to tell. Questions ready to ask. I have my go to conversation starters, you should too.
Some days my heart breaks, some days I feel amazing, but every day I’m learning something new about myself.
