Hateful Bigots Think Gay Children Will Destroy The Boy Scouts
Governor of Texas and failed GOP 2012 Presidential candidate Rick Perry took to Twitter this morning to pray to the Lord Almighty that the Boy Scouts of America uphold the teachings of Jesus and discriminate against those filthy, filthy gays.
Rick Perry got his way…SORT OF. The Boy Scouts of America will now allow openly gay scouts, however they are still banning gay scout leaders. Basically, the Boy Scouts would like all the gays under 18 to stand up tall and proud and come out of that closet…and then promptly get yourself back in that closet when you turn 18.
Still, some are VERY UNHAPPY that the Boy Scouts are no longer discriminating against gay CHILDREN. The following people are not only horrible bigots, but even more embarrassing, they are with the man who can’t remember three things, Rick Perry!
“Gays want everything nowadays.”
“Why do ‘homos’ infiltrate ever piece of society?!?!”
“‘Faggots’ wanna take over everything now.”
Can’t believe gay people have the nerve to want to be treated just like EVERYBODY ELSE!
THE GAY MAFIA. L O F’N L.
Not everyone can be as creative as Abraham here with simply adding his two cents of “fags.”
Hear that gays? You are the root of all evil!
‘Butt Scouts.’ Such a wordsmith!
Garrett and Mikey over here seem to believe for some odd reason that the Boy Scouts are some government run operation and that the “law” has been changed by “judges.” You’re right, Garrett! What is the world coming to? So many idiots such as yourself!
Poor Fred here must have heard the news through the grapevine, because he’s wrong about scout leaders. The pedophile part though is really why gay scouts are banned though, the folks that run Boy Scouts of America assume gay adult men = pedophiles.
And if you don’t blame him directly it’s those liberal heathens’ fault!
Now, let’s hear from good ole’ Fox News host Todd Starnes…
Ah, yes. That’s all the gays are about! SEX SEX SEX! They can’t do anything with sexualizing it! That’s why the straights never ever come across gay people when they go about their daily business.
Yes! Let the mass exodus of bigots’ shitty demon spawn begin!
Finally, I leave you with ole’ noted nutjob Bryan Fischer. He sees the writing on the walls for the Boy Scouts of America and has written an absolutely beautiful obituary…
Tears in my eyes, Bryan. Tears in my eyes…
…from all the fucking laughter.
Parenting: When you do it right
This is my Aunt Jess and her two babies, Dommie and Coley.
Aunt Jess lets her boys decide who they want to be and what they like. As a result, it’s okay that Dommie’s favorite color is purple/pink, even his binkies have to follow suit!
And when the State Fair ran out of pink sunglasses, Dommie reluctantly settled for pink flowers
And, instead of making a mockery of Dommie’s preferences, Aunt Jess didn’t even bat an eye at her son’s non-normative color preferences.
And, it’s even okay for Dommie to like purple AND wear necklaces!
Dommie is also allowed to choose his own toys.
And he gets to choose how to dress and how to keep his hair!
And Aunt Jess lets Dommie indulge any activity/hobby he is interested in, even the more effeminate ones such as…
1) Creating masterpieces
2) Playing masterpieces
But, this isn’t Aunt Jessica’s way of “having the girl she wasn’t blessed with,” because she allows Dommie to engage in more typically male activities, such as:
1) Hunting (not gathering)
2) Surviving in the wilderness
3) Showing his masculinity/toughness at billard halls
4) Exploring/Conquering nature
5) Playing an instrument that is a panty dropper
6) Playing a video game where you play a panty-dropping instrument
7) Keeping the order/peace
8) Saving Lives
9) Risking his life in extreme sports
10) Risking his life in combat with his brother
11) Being an athlete
12) And, of course, driving (and not stopping for directions)
So, it should be no surprise that, when Dommie asked to be a “purple sparkly princess” for Halloween, my Aunt obliged. And it should also be no surprise that she lets him love Justin Bieber. When people criticized Aunt Jessica for “letting” Dommie be a princess, she responded with the simplest fuck you in the world: “He wanted to be a princess. Why wouldn’t I let him? Don’t you want your children to be happy?” Essentially, she responded to hate with this:
And as for everyone worried my aunt’s “immoral” parenting will ruin Dommie, well…
I’d say he’s doing pretty fucking well.
“Carla Hale is a teacher — or was, before she lost her job at Bishop Watterson Catholic High School in Columbus, Ohio. See, when Ms. Hale’s mother died, the obituary mentioned all the survivors —and it included the name of her longtime partner. Now, one of the parents of a student at the school read this obituary and sent an anonymous letter — ’cause that’s what cowards do — to the school, calling the diocese disgraceful for employing a lesbian as a gym teacher. Now, if they called having a lesbian gym teacher “clichéd,” they might have had a point. But bigots don’t like points unless they can stab somebody in the back with them. As soon as she returned to her job after taking a few days off to bury her mom, Ms. Hale was called into a meeting with administrators. They showed her the anonymous letter — and fired her. Now, this story is more depressing and ridiculous than that last season of “The L Word.” But here’s the worst part: Ms. Hale’s termination letter actually said, “Your written spousal relationship violates the moral laws of the Catholic Church.” So here’s the good news — because the “moral laws of the Catholic Church” actually violate the laws of the Bible. There’s only one single passage of the entire Bible that homophobic Christians really use to condemn lesbians. From St. Paul’s letter to the Romans: “For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: For even their women did change their natural use into that which is against nature.” That’s it. The only reference to lesbians in the entire Bible. And, just like Hillary Swank and Chloe Sevigny in “Boys Don’t Cry,” it’s not even really about lesbians. See, once you get past the fact that this was written by a guy who never met Jesus and the great biblical tendency to refer to women as sexual objects — “women changed their natural use” — which kinda makes it all sound like the Gospel according to Ike Turner — all it says is that Roman women once did “that which is against nature.” We live in a society where you can inject botulism in your forehead — but Ellen’s against nature? The only kind of sexuality, my friends, against nature is pretending to be straight when you’re not. What Paul’s really talking about there in that part of the letter are ancient Roman temple practices of worshiping gods that were mostly human/animal hybrids. God turned his back on those Romans and then they got all kinky. Many theologians believe Paul’s really talking about ritual bestiality of the Romans. It’s another case of Christians who don’t know the Bible, but use it to justify their hate — and that’s a bigger cliché than any group of flannel-wearing, softball-playing, men-hating sapphos driving pickups to a Wellesley reunion at Lilith Fair. Now, Ms. Hale has filed a complaint with the city of Columbus, which prohibits firing employees based on sexual orientation — and her local teacher’s union has chosen not to support her. But we do. Because in that same letter to the Romans, chapter 2, verses 1 through 3, Paul also says: “Therefore you have no excuse or defense or justification, O man, whoever you are who judges and condemns another. For in posing as judge and passing your sentence on another, you condemn yourself.” Oops. Turns out the homophobes are the ones violating the moral laws. And if you still want to discriminate against Americans based on something that’s not even in your holy book — well, guess what, Reverend — you can start paying your taxes like everyone else. One final Bible quote from the Book of Ruth: “Where you go, I will go; where you lodge I will lodge; your people shall be my people, and your God my God. Where you die, I will die — there will I be buried.” But it’s a passage about two women — Ruth and Naomi. The Bible never calls them lesbian, but it celebrates their love and uses the same Hebrew word used to describe how Adam felt about Eve. So remember — there’s one or two mentions of gay men in the entire Bible, but at no point does the Almighty ever forbid women being with women. And I find it just a bit curious that God has the same policy as Vivid Video.”—Leapin’ lesbians! John Fugelsang on what the Bible really says about gay women
Queer Moments in Adventure Time
Here’s a collection of little moments of LGBTQ goodness in Adventure Time (version 3.0!). Note: I’m NOT suggesting that all of these characters are outright queer. I just feel like highlighting some of the queer-friendly content from the show. Let me know if I missed anything!
- Abracadaniel - rainbow powers, would “turn and push” any princess away (Wizard Battle)
- Baby Snaps - referred to as a male, but longs to be a princess (Princess Cookie)
- BMO - addressed with both male and female pronouns; confirmed by crew as genderless; “#1 MO” coffee mug (Puhoy); possibly panromantic: imagines a past relationship with “Lorraine” (BMO Noire) and wants to marry Bubble (BMO Lost)
- Finn - Jake teases Finn for calling a lava man hot, “like ‘sexy’ hot” (Prisoners of Love); creates NEPTR as a “son” with Ice King (What Is Life?); kisses Prince Huge to break the frog spell (The Hard Easy); equal opportunity shipper, including BMO/Ice King (All the Little People)
- Fionna - technically enjoyed a pleasant date with Ice Queen (Fionna and Cake)
- Gladiators - mourned their lost lovers and walked away together in pairs; crew confirmed they were all gay (Morituri Te Salutamus)
- Huntress Wizard - enthusiastically stayed to battle for a kiss from Princess Bubblegum (Wizard Battle)
- Ice King - wants to marry Princess Finn (AT Issue #14)
- Jake - legally marries (and divorces) Ice King (Ocean of Fear); “I love you, Billy! I have a secret crush on you, Billy!” (His Hero); foot-pops while kissing Death (Death in Bloom)
- Little People - mini-BMO/Ice King and mini-Abracadaniel/Lollipop Girl/Choose Goose hit it off (All the Little People)
- LSP - “No Jessica! Don’t cheat on Tony with me!” (The Monster); after merging with Lady Rainicorn, whispers “I’m ready for you now Brad” (The Creeps)
- Muscular Ghost - “Aight Clarence, but only because of that one time when I did that thing by accident and you were cool about it.” (Ghost Princess)
- Peppermint Butler - falls madly in love with Broco/Ogdoad (The Suitor)
- Princess Bubblegum/Marceline - possible romantic subtext (What Was Missing, Marceline and the Scream Queens); tentacle innuendo (AT Issue #2); Ice King telling Marceline, “I get the princesses, and you get…whatever it is you’re into.” (I Remember You)
Love is Love is Love
When I kiss her for the first time,
I am too busy hating myself to enjoy it.
Her hips are so small in my palms
that I suddenly feel dangerous.
Later I cry about this in the bathtub
while imagining my loving her is
some great heist I have pulled off,
somehow cracked her body open like a safe
and emptied it of value. I will be arrested
once they dust my fingerprints off her skin.
The fifth time I kiss her, it all begins
to come together in my head.
I realize I am not harming anyone;
I kiss her harder.
After the thirtieth or so kiss,
I stop regarding love as something
of a social interest. I stop accounting
for what other people might think.
The hundredth time, I do it in public
and enjoy it so much, I do it again.