THIS JUST IN: GLEE IS SHIT, RIPS OFF JONATHAN COULTON
Glee recently covered Baby Got Back (AKA the “I like big butts and I cannot lie” song), a song that famous geek songwriter Jonathan Coulton did an acoustic guitar cover of many years back, and instead of coming up with their own arrangement they just straight up wholesale copied Coulton’s version of the song (Coulton himself is saying that they might even have used some of his audio)
For comparison, here is a stereo track with Jonathan Coulton’s cover in one ear and the Glee version in the other
EDIT: Some people have expressed doubt that this is actually a Glee track, since the episode hasn’t aired yet and whatnot. The answer to that is, it most definitely is a Glee track because it’s for sale on the Swedish iTunes store right now, attributed to the Glee cast and copyrighted to Fox and all
For comparison’s sake, here’s JoCo’s version of Baby Got Back with Glee’s version linked up to play at the same time.
The Cake Is A LieKavalier Calm
This Portal-themed song is in response to a request from Gabs over at the awesome blog The Awkward Gamer. Gabs told me to be sure to reference the infamous “the cake is a lie” line, so I made it the focus of my song. Fans will instantly notice that I borrowed the tune sung by GLaDOS at the end of Portal (“Still Alive” by Jonathan Coulton); I merely rewrote the lyrics from a disgruntled and hungry test subject’s point of view. It didn’t make sense to sing as the ever-silent Chell, so I wrote from our perspective—the many lab rats caught in Aperture Science’s maze. This song is dedicated to Gabs for the great request, and to these blogs with unique/quality Portal content: whatthechell, mathematicalerror, ask-glados-or-cavejohnson, fyeahhumanoidportal, f***yeahv4lve, videogamenostalgia, and gamefreaks. You can download this song for free here, and stream it/subscribe to us on YouTube here. Enjoy! — Kavalier
The Cake Is A Lie
This was a joke. I’m making a note here: EPIC FAIL.
It’s hard to overstate my disappointment.
Lab rat of science—that’s all I ever was.
Because I can, I fought through the maze—trying to find cake.
And there’s sense crying over all of the lies.
You promised cake that doesn’t exist.
But the Science got done, and you made your gun.
And the truth dies with us lab rats.
And I’m angry. I’m being so sincere right now.
You didn’t care for my heart or if you killed me
and tore me to pieces. You teleported my atoms
and they burned as they transformed because I so hated you.
And solving your puzzles may have made me smile.
But I thought Alphas like me earned a treat.
And I’m sad I played your dishonest game
Now that I know the cake was a lie.
Please don’t leave me. I want out of this labyrinth.
I heard at Black Mesa they have brownies.
THIS IS NO JOKE. I WANT TO BE A FAT RAT.
And your fake cake can’t tempt me any longer.
Look at me still solving puzzles like a good mouse.
GLaDOS writes the rules in Aperture’s house.
And I’ll work my way through these test chamber rooms.
Even though the cake is a lie. And believe me the cake is a lie.
The Science and cake is a lie. It feels AWFUL that the cake is a lie.
Fellow lab rats, the cake is a lie. We are dying for a lie.
The cake is a lie.
So, lab rats…uh, I mean gamers, do you think the cake is a lie?