I'm trying to remember the title for this video game, I've looked for it everywhere but can't seem to find it. From what I remember you play as a character that has the face of a turtle and is wearing a suit. It was a platformer, and your neck could stretch up almost infinitely. I believe the first intro level was a castle and the first boss was a giant bear. Do you know what the title might be?
UPDATE: People are saying this is one of the James Pond games. And it looks like there’s a bear in this one:
James Pond 2: Codename: RoboCod (EA/Vectordean - Genesis - 1991)
UPDATE from oxhair: “That’s definitely it! Thank you so much!”
So we were playing Aquatic Games last night, and I noticed a couple of things about the world in which this ostensibly lighthearted track and field romp is set.
This is our ‘Fintastic Foursome,’ the team trainers:
Steve Clam, Flappy MacBeak, Mickey O’Shell and Billy the Squid.
Pay special attention to Steve Clam. You can’t trust a shellfish in a hat, that’s what my old grandmother used to say. And, let me tell you, that woman knew her bivalves.
Anyway, in the world of the Aquatic Games, the penguins from James Pond 2: Robocod developed Stockholm Syndrome during their captivity by Dr Maybe, then slowly became corrupted under his tutelage.
At some point between the end of Pond 2 and the beginning of Aquatic Games the penguins left their polar home, took over a tropical paradise and turned it into a Mengelian hellscape.
They performed vile experiments on the animals of the island, with a particular penchant for removing the fins from marine creatures and grafting atrophied legs in their place. This dolphin was given legs and forced to ride a unicycle:
Our hero, James Pond, was also subjected to this bizarre operation (the ‘Ariel’ they called it. How they laughed their sinister penguin laughs). In a move that showed the utter contempt the penguins felt for a once mighty fish, they even injected him with enough steroids to turn a bull into a minotaur:
You know, James never recovered from the experiments he endured on Aquatic Island. In Operation Starfish, one year on from Games, he’s still a fucked up fish-human hybrid. At least he was able to kick the ‘roids.
For James, the scars are both physical and mental. I could write an essay on the psychology of James Pond post-Aquatic Games.
But I wanted to talk a bit more about Steve Clam, the team trainer for the Swamp Bay Splashers:
Hey, Steve.
In the world of Aquatic Games, pretty much every obstacle is made from a living creature. The hurdles are electric eels, ramps are crabs, sponges are… uh, sponges.
But not these pink oysters:
It seems odd that everything else in this 16-bit nightmare is alive, but the pink oysters, central to the Bouncy Castle round, are dead. Why? What killed them?
What’s that, Steve? They’re your dead wives?
…
…
… shit.
James Pond:- Underwater Agent - Commodore Amiga 500
The names Pond, James Pond, Bubble O Seven, License to bubble…
License to bubble? thats the best they could come up with? - they did’nt even come up with Bubble O Seven and it was a bleedin’ obvious gag!
Anyway, today I sat down, popped James Pond into the ol Amiga and booted it up. Now, I played this game back when it was new and pretty much a must have game if you owned an Amiga, maybe my memory is rusty as I did’nt enjoy this as much as I thought I was going to. Can’t quite put my finger on it…
So lets get stuck in, this is an obvious gag take on the James Bond franchise, and if any of you ask who that is, I am going to personally come to your house and slap you around the face with a wet fish! Anyway, the plot to the game goes as follows ( Be ready for a host of Bond related chortles - Ed ). The evil Supervillain, “Doctor Maybe” ( thats one! - Ed ), now in charge of the megacorporation ACME Oil Company! Filling the ocean with toxic chemicals, imprisioning innocent marine wildlife and generally being a pain in the walther PPK….As Pond, you are hired by the British Secret Service ( Who else? - Ed ), to protect the oceans and put a stop to the dastardy deeds of Doctor Maybe! The level names take their inspiration from the Bond movies themselves, starting with the not so great - License to bubble, to the more inspiring a view to a spill -( I warned you! - Ed ). Mostly this is a cutsey romp of left and right scrolling, bubbling bad guys and popping them ( Maybe Bub and Bob were his trainers? - Ed ), finding bonus items and clearing away nasty rubbish under the waves.
The graphics for this game are nice, colourful and bright, sprites are eye pleasing to look at and animate very well, then you’d expect this from the Amiga and it’s internal power house of a system. Nice smooth scrolling as you zip around the water filled landscape on your search for imprisioned crabs in the first stage and other such missions of great importance. There are some nice touches, like if you jump out of the water and go onto the little land there is at the top of the level, a passing Pelican will scoop you up and fly around with you, while your health starts to dip, best get back in the water as soon as you can. To finish a level you must achieve certain goals, like stage ones imprisioned crabs, certain number will unlock the portal to level 2…and so on, and so on. A grip I did have was I entered what seemed to be a bonus cavern, with the letter P ( I’ll have a P please Bob - Ed ), but could’nt pick it up or anything which led to my oxygen running out and death…over….and over….and over….
Sound wise, the game gives you the option of playing with or without music…personally I quite liked the music in the game so that was the option I played with, within the first level it’s a sort of agent themed spy music, but as soon as you hit level 2….JOLLY! Oh yes, it’s probably the theme tune everyone will remember from playing James Pond and it’s one that gets stuck in your head, and you will whistle and hum this for hours…no matter how much you don’t want to.
Overall a fun little game, frustrating in parts, but I don’t think theres a game out there that does’nt contain something that annoys the spotted pants off a Giraffe!
Okay so Wikipedia shed some light on this stupid James Pond game.
“Although Acme Oil Co. has been destroyed by James Pond, Pond’s arch enemy Dr Maybe survived and has retreated to the North Pole where he has taken over Santa’s workshop.
This time, however, due to the greater risks involved in this mission, Pond is given a robotic suit and the code name “RoboCod” (a pun on RoboCop). This suit gives Pond superhuman strength and agility as well as enabling him to stretch his midsection almost indefinitely and reach otherwise impossibly high areas.”
I think this is the most ridiculous plot to grace gaming, which isn’t even explained. Christ.
