So I'm reading a review of a Bible translation.

As I often do on Friday nights.

Nude.

Nipples glistening with olive oil.

Just kidding. I’m fully clothed and my nipples are dry and clean.

But I’m reading this review of the JB Phillips translation of the New Testament. Now, this is one of my favorite modern translations, which is actually why I started reading the review in the first place. Virtually all modern Bible translations suck massive donkey cock, but not this one.

The reviewer was up in arms about a particular passage in John where Jesus addresses a woman as “Woman.” Phillips renders it as “Ma’am”. The reviewer was bitching about Phillips changing the words of the Bible, changing it’s meaning! He mocked what he considered Mr. Phillips’ sense of propriety and politeness. Never mind that all fundy translations of the Bible insert the word “homosexual” in 1 Corinthians 6:9 when the Greek word for homosexual WAS NOT USED.

It makes it easier to be a bigoted assmunch if you change the words of the Bible to fit your bigoted assmunch views, you see.

Yep, Phillips did change the word to “Ma’am” where in the Greek Jesus used “Woman.” But addressing a woman as Woman is not as crude, impolite, or sexist as it sounds in English. It was actually a formal and polite way of speaking, like saying M’Lady or….Ma’am.

So that’s what I’m doing. On Friday night. While drinking tea.

I’m a wild man, baby.