love note 2 self - 2013 til forever

word up to me in terms of how long ive been trying to deal with my degrading mental health on my own. i don’t agree with an internalized logic that dictates that pain must be endured and resolved in silence, paying as much respect to the convenience of others as possible. i think this is partially a mechanism of an ableist society to deepen the sense of isolation and shame for self amongst it’s constituents. with that said, even though i may be doing it for the wrong reasons, i want to affirm that it’s a sign of my strength as a persyn that i have been holding it together for so long, that shows discipline and strength of will. i just had that thought and i wanted to crystlize it in words so that i will feel it & keep it. 

i think i will have to reach out in a different way than i have before to my therapist and mental health care services & there’s strength in seeing that & acting on that too. just hope i keep true to it this time. love to my feelers on the internet going thru relatable struggles. don’t forget about all that strength in your frailty.

from HTMLflowergirl
2 grant
& everybody else
xoxo