the basic idea of butthole feminism, as created by mgraceee - as a joke, she would probably like to remind everyone, butthole feminism is something we should reject - is to describe a rather worrying trend is that we’re increasingly worried about how to make straight men feel manly for enjoying things including, but limited to fucking them with strap-ons.
so: feminism where women have to take care of men and coo and tell them that they can cling on to patriarchal definitions of masculinity while still getting orgasms, basically.
the oxford student who needs feminism because he shouldn’t have to feel unmanly for enjoying his girlfriend’s strap-on - why is that our responsibility as feminist? why must my praxis as a woman include making sure your orgasm is manly?
the same day as I heard about the Oxford student, we heard Dan Savage discuss how straight men were so stressed (also: misogyny, and grossness at the link) because apparently straight guys aren’t free because, straightness and manliness is so limiting.
and I’m just so over having to reassure straight men that their strap-on sex isn’t gay. I’m so over having to assure straight men about their sexuality. I’m so over having to assure straight men about their place in the world while I’m trying to deal with their shit as a bisexual woman.