I hope this doesn't get me fired...

Parked at the gate during boarding in McAllen, TX earlier today…

“Hey folks, from the flight deck, welcome aboard flight 4882, service to Houston, should be under way here in just a moment. We’ve got Britney and Samantha in the back for your comfort and safety so please abide by any instructions they have for you throughout the flight. Current conditions in Houston, gusty winds from the northwest, cloudy skies, a temperature of 60 degrees. If there’s anything we can do to make your flight more enjoyable please don’t hesitate to let us know. Any Rangers fans on board?”

[a handful of cheers eminates from the back of the plane, making it’s way through the open cockpit door to me]

“Great, GO CARDINALS! Other than that, sit back, relax, enjoy the one hour, fourteen minute flight to Houston.”