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Fuck the Hand Sanitizer Gel, I'd Rather Get a Cold
God Damn. Everywhere I look: restrooms, cubicles, cars, nightstands, offices, restaurants, stores, blah-fucking-blah-blah-blah, I see hand sanitizer gel. Why? Because we’re deathly afraid of germs, and viruses like the Swine Flu (which by the way can’t be defeated by gels marketed by powerhouse brands like Purell and Dial). Ever think that maybe our immune systems would be more IMMUNE if we let ourselves live a little and grow some balls?
We’re so fucked up that we won’t even touch the soap pump that PUMPS SOAP. Yeah that’s right: THE FUCKING SOAP PUMP. Jesus fucking christ people. Insert the obligatory we’re-so-fucked-up-about-germs-video:
I’m sorry but the thought of germs just creeps me out okay? I mean everytime someone sneezes millions of germs go into the air. It’s horrible. I literally just cleaned down the entire kitchen with bleach whilst wearing rubber gloves when I was only asked to wipe it down. I had to make sure everything had been cleaned with bleach. Seriously though, we eat in there, I don’t want to eat when there are tons of germs in there.
I refuse to let anyone touch me as well for the simple reason I’m scared of them spreading germs. I have to make sure people sanitize their hands before touching me and I have to keep hand sanitizer in my blazer.
My sister keeps calling me a ‘Germaphobe’. Seriously, there isn’t anything wrong with what I’m doing…Well I don’t think so. Surely I can’t be the ONLY one who does this sort of thing..The thought of germs scares me. Not my fault.