A Step-by-Step Guide to Dyeing Your Hair at Home for Aproximately $10 and Only A Few Tears
The first step to solving any problem is admitting you have the problem. One morning, you will wake up and stare blearily at your reflection in the mirror, accidentally stabbing yourself in the eye with the mascara wand as you try to wake up. And you will realize your hair has tragically become the color of a burnt ombre death sunset over a sewage pond. And that is not OK.
The next step is to identify you want to color your hair. And that desire should stay with you for days and days and weeks as you pass by the hair dye aisle at your local CVS/Wal-Mart/Convenience Store Death Trap of Choice…you will briefly consider stopping and buying that hair dye TODAY but will rapidly chicken out due to the intensely complicated labels, colors, foams, creams, highlighting sets, and paint-by-number kits available to you.
Approximately 1-3 months later, when your hair color now resembles putrid skunk in heat, you will finally break down and wander the hair dye aisle. Feel free to embark on such soul-crushing adventures as Would I Really Look Good as a Blonde or Is My Sister Shitting Me? or I Could Pull Off Sassy Red Head Without Looking Like a Vegas Stripper, Right?…before settling on a color that is only 4% different than your current hair color.
Everyone knows hair dye, like fine wine and cheese, only grows better with age. Feel free to leave that box of hair dye stewing and hibernating under the sink or in your closet for another 1-3 months.
