“I would not respect myself if I didn’t do the research, have an open mind, and make an informed decision based on the information before me. I cannot legally come up with an argument against gay marriage. I cannot deny a person the same rights that I have with my wife ... Who am I to say that someone does not have the same rights that I have with my wife whom I love?”—State senator Mark Grisanti (R-Buffalo), on his vote for gay marriage rights in New York.
A submission from one of my trans* followers regarding the AZ bathroom law
He has requested me to submit this on his behalf and has offered to answer any questions anyone has on his blog.
Let me tell you a little bit about myself. My name is Ethan - here’s a quick photo I took of myself in the mirror yesterday morning.
I’m 21 years old, a junior in college, and as far as most of my peers know just an average guy. And for the most part, I am. Because I choose to live as stealth, the people I interact with on a daily basis have no way of knowing that I am transgender. I was born female, and up until the age of 19 lived as one - albeit awkwardly and uncomfortably. I always identified strongly with the boys, and my masculine appearance and habits invited ridicule and scorn from not only my peers but my family.
I was born and continue to live in South Carolina, where most people have no concept of what it means to be transgender or how mentally painful and exhausting it is to feel as if your entire existence is wrong. Once I met another transgender male and began to learn that there was hope out there for me to live a “normal” life, my relief quickly became clouded over by the frustration, anxiety, and pain of coming out to family and friends who often just don’t understand and won’t even try. I began identifying and presenting myself as male full-time, but because my outward appearance was still feminine I faced scrutiny every where I went. Already prone to social anxiety, I retreated into myself even further and reached a point where I felt suicidal - the prospect of facing another day of trying my hardest to read as male but invariably either being met with confusion or read as female was unbearable. The disconnect between who I felt I was and who my physical appearance presented me as caused pain that I cannot begin to describe.
During this time, I dreaded needing to use the restroom while on campus, in a store, or otherwise in public. What for most people is routine had me crippled with anxiety. Should I use the women’s restroom, where my biology said I “belonged”, and risk the all-too-frequent stares of other occupants trying to puzzle out my gender - only increasing the anxiety and dysphoria I already felt in a zone marked for a gender with which I didn’t identify? Or should I risk the men’s room, where barely-passing guys like me often are confronted or attacked? Some days I would hold my bladder the entire day rather than make the choice. I felt that no matter what I did, I lost. And unfortunately, I attend a college where only one building I know of has a unisex restroom available.
Today, I am 10 months on testosterone and live full-time as male. I have had my name legally changed, and no longer have to deal with strange looks, judging eyes, or inappropriate and hurtful questions from bank tellers, gas station employees, faculty/staff at my school, and any other person who asks me to present my ID. When I upgraded my phone at Best Buy last summer, before my name change but after starting testosterone, the employee there drilled me throughout the process wanting to know why I had a girl’s name and asking if my family had given me one because they hated me. Now that my legal name on all my documents and paperwork reflects my true gender, simple tasks that used to be daunting are again easy. I’m able to make friends, I am successful in school, and have seen marked improvement in my mental health - something I’ve been struggling with since middle school.
But my gender marker on my driver’s license any other documentation still bears that telltale “F” - I live in a state where the process of changing that is muddled and confusing at best, and downright impossible at worst. Under a law like the one in Arizona, I would be placed in prison for 6 months - and more than likely, as a close friend of mine was at one time (also due to a discriminatory law against transgender people in FL), placed in a women’s facility where my appearance would no doubt single me out.
And so, iwasthesilentgirl and any others like you who may support this bill in AZ, I ask you - after seeing my photo and reading my story, would you rather that I be forced to use the women’s restroom alongside you? What would you think if you were in a public restroom taking care of business, maybe discussing tampons with a friend as you claim to do, and I walked in? Bearing in mind that I sound, look, and carry myself as male. Would you prefer that over my being allowed to use the men’s restroom? Can you look at me in good conscience and tell me that I deserve to spend 6 months in prison simply for walking into a men’s restroom? Because my situation is no different than that of a transgender female, only reversed. If you are so worried that men will come into your restroom and harass you, what do you think those same men will do to trans* women who are forced into the men’s rooms? It doesn’t matter what you think, to be honest - the history is terrifyingly clear. Trans* people like myself risk fall victim to horrific crimes every day because of attitudes like yours, all adding up to a culture that labels us as “different” or “wrong” and somehow less deserving of respect.
- I’m all for having your own opinion if you have legitimate reasons and arguments for believing what you do.
- I’m voting no this fall because I believe in equality. I believe that my best friend should be able to marry the man he loves if he so chooses. I’m voting to stand up for his rights, I’m voting for respect of all people, and i’m voting for supporting love between all people. People of the GLBTGI community deserve every right that I have as a heterosexual woman, especially marriage.
- I’m voting no because of separation of government and religion. I grew up Catholic, I no longer affiliate with any religion but I respect people who are religious. One of my best friends is Catholic but she is a Catholic who actually stands for what Catholicism is suppose to mean. She follows the story of Jesus and not just random aspects of the bible that defend/argue against today’s social topics. Also, I give mad props to people who are Catholic and are voting no, and are standing up for their beliefs and not just following the church blindly.
- The Bible is not a valid argument for being against GLBTQI rights. The typical passages about gay abomination also talk about selling your daughter to be a prostitute and how thats okay. So…. unless you’re all for prostitution too…
- This is my generations civil right movement. Enough said.
- Also, if GLBT people get the right to marry, which they should, that won’t change anything for straight people. It will help boost the economy too if you think about it finiancially… imagine how many more weddings there would be!
- Also GLBT people are going to marry other people… stop arguing that they are going to marry animals or something weird like that. A man who is gay wants to marry another man, not manatee. This is argument literally doens’t make sense.
- Also voting no, changes absolutely nothing in Minnesota. [Which is sad] It’s not allowing GLBT to get married, it’s allowing us to keep DISCUSSING it and getting closer to getting GLBT that right.
Saw this on my dash this morning and felt like I had to respond in some way. I’d reblog from the OP, but I don’t feel like getting into an argument this morning, so I’ll just paraphrase and respond here.
You say that Tumblr is very pro-homosexuality and very anti-religion. I say that while it’s true that Tumblr is a site that seems to be very accepting of GLBT people, I know a lot of religious people on Tumblr — most of whom I’ve met through fandom. I also know a lot of agnostics and atheists. Moreover, of the 300+ people I follow, only one or two of them are virulently anti-religion.
You say that supporting true equality means supporting everything, not just picking and choosing. I can buy that. However, where I draw the line is when people start being dicks about it. This includes the fundamentalist Christians who picket colleges to tell students that they’re going to Hell, or military funerals to tell everyone that the reason the deceased soldier is now in Hell is because America is pro-gay; it includes fundamentalists of all religions starting wars against one another because their deities aren’t the same; it includes overt racism, sexism, classism, sizeism, etc. You cannot force a person to believe things — and this doesn’t just apply to religion. That does not mean, however, that I cannot disapprove of the way they behave based on their beliefs.
You imply that marriage equality is somehow an infringement of the beliefs of religious people who are anti-GLBT. I’m sorry, but did you miss the part of the new New York state law wherein it states that no religious institution will be forced to perform marriages for GLBT congregants? I doubt that most GLBT people will want to marry in the churches that are objecting to their new rights, anyway. And the deeply closeted members of the fundamentalist churches’ congregations are, sadly, very unlikely to sprint to the altar once the 30-day window has closed and marriage certificates start being issued.
Beliefs are not being infringed upon, here. You can believe that GLBT people will burn in Hell all you want, whether or not they’re afforded the legal right to marry whomever they love. Marriage equality isn’t going to change that.
Being gay is a choice.
“Because it’s a choice, it is perfectly acceptable to treat gays a second class citizens and strip them of certain rights and privileges that everyone else is entitled to. Gays are the bringing about the downfall of society by destroying the moral fabric that binds us all together as human beings.
Furthermore, gays have no place in government, as they simply cannot be trusted not to push the gay agenda on their fellow citizens. What is the gay agenda? Recruitment. Since no one is born gay, gay people have to try to indoctrinate and recruit the rest of us at an early age, before we have the wherewithal to figure out for ourselves that the gay agenda is a lie. Because of this agenda of recruitment, which includes lying and neglecting moral behavior, gay couples should not be allowed to raise children.
This is what christian conservatives believe.
Now read it again, substituting the word “christian” for the word “gay”.”
Written by ‘Cleev’ on Reddit.
I felt like sharing.
VERY URGENT PETITION!
Please, REBLOG, this is VERY important!
Russia is approving an ANTI-GLBT LAW! On the following link all the infos:
STOP THIS! Here there is the petition against this law, please SIGN IT!