I didn’t realize how wildly incompetent I actually am until I started a new job hostessing at a restaurant. I was a hostess in DC too but this new job is like a legit restaurant where people are important and fancy and I have to do things correctly.
I basically just derp around not knowing where things are and getting flustered when I have too many tasks and pressing the talk button on my walkie talkie incorrectly so all the managers and hosts can hear me going “Is this how you… uh…” for a few minutes. Also when I have the earpiece in I don’t know how to moderate the volume of my voice so I will either shout at all the guests or talk so quietly that no one can hear me.
And I sort of have a primitive fear of answering the phones because I don’t know anything about anything and I can barely get it together to make a phone reservation in OpenTable properly. And you can’t let it ring for more than 3 rings or keep anyone on hold for longer than 2 minutes, so when multiple phone lines ring at once I shut down and flap my arms ineffectually and then answer after too much time has gone by.
The point of this post is to talk about all the ways in which I am basically a non-functioning human.
From an article on a local construction project.
“According to VP and CFO [name omitted] there is a pretty strong potential of this happening in the future as it has been conducted and gone through a great many permits that needed to be issued from civil, state and federal authorities for approval since the initial process in 1993 and went through with concrete plans for our own site ten years ago.”