The new ad for the FIFA 12 video game features some of the biggest names in football offering a humorous take on what they want for Christmas. As enjoyable as it is, it was not the original dialogue for the spot. On the first take, they let the players improvise their own lines. This is how it went wrong…

Gerard Pique: Shakira gave me these. Zlatan always gave much better gifts. Like tourniquets and kicks to the head.

Jack Wilshere: This is what all the Arsenal lads wear while Robin van Persie scores goals.

Wayne Rooney: What am I gonna do with a puppy? I can’t have sex with this.

Tim Cahill: Can I…can I smoke this?

Kaka: I don’t want to alarm anyone, but the Santa elf beside me is most definitely possessed by the devil.

Wilshere: All I want for Christmas? Is the the ball.

Rooney: The ball.

Pique: Balls.

Cahill: The bong.

Kaka: Jesus I love you!

Pique: Haha you haven’t had your hair transplant yet.