“¦You can learn a lot about someone and how they handle life, just by watching them explore a cave. What do they take? What do they do? Is reaching the end the goal, or appreciating the beauty of the moment? I encourage you all to take a friend exploring a cave with you. Youâd be surprised what you learn about themâ¦”
“ It wasn’t Apollo 1 that went to the moon – it was Apollo 11. Sometimes, even if you do know what you’re doing, and you are prepared, you still fail and have to limp home under your own power, making the best of what you have – look at Apollo 13.
“But that still leaves the question – “What should I be listening to this Friday evening?” The obvious answer is Rebecca Black, arguably the most talented artist of our generation. Her ability to seamlessly autotune herself singing the days of the week along with the words, “fun fun fun” has changed the landscape of music, and the word “Friday” forever. I’m happy to live in a world where “Friday” is no longer the quintessential Ice Cube and Chris Tucker film.
Okay, I rescind my last paragraph about Rebecca Black. I’d actually like to shove a 14-gauge Mossberg into her mouth and spray her brain matter into the back seat of a Chrysler Sebring convertible while gleefully yelling, “Which seat are you gonna f**kin’ sit in?! Which f**kin’ seat, b***h?!” Ah, yes. We all have dreams.”
— Music Rebecca Black Would Never Listen to on Friday by californiacornbread for Earmilk.com, 04.01.2011