((In trying to re-find my favorite Jonolee fic, I have stumbled upon a list of things Jono is Not Allowed to Do.))
((Among them are these:
- Not allowed to burp the alphabet, even though I can now.
- Not allowed to eat Jubilee’s secret stash of candy, even if I claim “I have to make up for lost time.”
- Not allowed to set up a kissing booth, even if I claim “I have to make up for lost time.”
- Not even if I do it as a fundraiser for the team.
- Not allowed to wear leather pants when out of uniform, as it distracts the ladies.
- The sole exception to this rule is when Jubilee wants to go dancing.
- If I plan to do anything based on the fact that I am making up for lost time, I am to assume that I am not allowed to do it.
I SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED TO BE THIS AMUSED. P.S. I found the fic, and this is it.))
The Starsmore Family Response to Jono Spawning, by Dorksidefiker
“Oh God, he’s finally gone and done it.”
“Who’s done what? Did Cal finally steal all the books from the library? Lysander fill the pool with cement? Little Johnny run off and become an accountant?”
“Worse. It’s Jonothon.”
“All the ‘o’s. Lucy and Abraham’s boy. Ran off to be an underwear pervert in the states.”
“Oh. Him. Did he finally finish blowing up?”
“Don’t we wish. He’s spawned.”
“Oh God. It’s not with the vampire, is it? The Old Man’ll have a total meltdown-”
“No, not the vampire. This is so much worse.”
“How could it be worse than the vampire? Well, maybe the pop tart…”
“Well, French-Canadian, but it’s the same damn thing. And she’s nuts.”
“Assuming she’s part of the spandex crowd, isn’t that a given?”
“I mean ‘On Medication’ nuts. Certified nuts.”
“I don’t think we’re allowed to call them nuts anymore, actually.”
“Will you just stop? Do you have any idea how big a headache this is going to be for us?”
“I told you we should have given him a vasectomy.”
“Yeah yeah, you’re always right, rub it in why don’t you? What are we going to DO?”
“Is bringing her into the fold out of the question?”
“Don’t you think we have enough nuts in the family?”
“Mentally ill, please. She’s not family yet, so we should at least try to be polite.”
“Are you sure you’re actually a Starsmore? I’m starting to have my doubts.”
(( I am amused by the fact that I think “underwear freak” means superhero heheheeh)))
If it’s any comfort (and I doubt that it is, but…), my hardcore Trekkie mother is boycotting the whole franchise over this until a new director is on the series.
Bless your Trekkie mother.
I don’t think I’ll be seeing Abrams’ Star Wars movies either when/if he makes them.
He’ll probably make a Lando origin movie and cast Michael Cera as young Lando or some fuckery.
tuchin ur butt
well i guess theres lots of space back there…………………:/poblet replied to your post: what
being shortly very disappointed, I imagine
yeah that’s the one
guys i hope you know i … actually i dont even know where to start?? i am a terrible person, you guysdorksidefiker replied to your post: what
Staring at you lovingly and building a shrine out of discarded hair.
I NEEDED that hair!! GOD YOU GUYS ARE SO RUDEombrophilia replied to your post: what
you’re tumblr famous, squeak. honestly i was expecting it to be because of taxidermy, not homestuck.
coming up: homestuck themed taxidermy
for my next trick i will sew a shrivelled monkey’s head onto those pheasant wings i have lying around and then staple a tiny pair of sunglasses to the front of its face
dorksidefiker replied to your post: lies down on floor lets out a muffled scream…
If it’s any comfort, my brother also loathes Ed, Edd, and Eddy… though for different reasons than you do (three guesses what his name is!)
i guess it’s, like, making a comeback and a really mean part of me is like “god, can’t you be nostalgic over a show that didn’t suck?”
What got you in to Monster High in the first place?
Ahhh some people I followed on dA were into it and did some fanart and that was my first exposure. I thought it was kind of neat but never really looked at them. Then the march before last I was buying a toy for my niece and we saw the Dead Tired line. I saw Cleo and totally fell in love with her. How can someone not love them? They are so cool looking. I had a handful of barbie’s growing up but I could never afford the really cool ones, mostly just had budget dolls. So we bought my niece DT Draculaura (For the pinkness and cause she was having a sleepover) and my husband talked me into getting the Cleo because I was so totally in love with her. A few weeks later my husband saw the Black and White Skull Shores Frankie and omg how cool is that? It was on sale at WalMart.
The obsession REALLY started last May though.
Thus began the slippery slope.
In fact here’s the first photo of my collection:
Taken last May
I have 118 now god
link to the chamber mini for dorksidefiker and for anyone else who wants it (because it’s a bitch to find and also to buy. i’ve been looking for ages ugh) :)
here - and its the mirrors at the bottom, not the first links
dorksidefiker replied to your post: its been so long since i gave any thought to Young Avengers
Its a beautiful thing when you come back to a fandom.
We-eell, the fandom probably not so much (I burnt out, hard) but the canon is my forever baby love.
dorksidefiker answered: Journey into Mystery, Avengers: the Children’s Crusade, Dracula: Company of Monsters
I was reading Children’s Crusade! But I think I might have lost track of it halfway through or something. D: I’ll keep the others in mind!
wtfxmen answered: GENERATION HOPE and i would also rec some dc but that seems pointless at this point
Oh, I saw Generation Hope’s trade yesterday and considered picking it up but could not remember what people had said about it.
I SO know what you mean about DC. I kept seeing titles I considered before going “OH WAIT, they’ll be gone in a few months” :/
dorksidefiker replied to your post: thedeaditeslayer said: There’s a worse sexual…
… correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t the Tree Rape one of the things Raimi has been saying for years that he’d take out of the movie? Yeah, I’m gonna be over here headdesking at the fail of the new creative team.
That’s exactly what he’s said. I’m really confused why he wouldn’t advise this team against it??? Maybe he did and they ignored him??? I don’t know. When I watch the original Evil Dead, I usually just skip most of that sequence so I don’t have to deal with it.