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Thoughts when I'm having period cramps
- me: Oh ow. Ok. Alright let's just find the midol.
- 20 minutes later: Hmm that doesn't... feel... right.
- another 15 minutes later: Oh God, am I dying?
- 10 more minutes: Ok these definitely are not period cramps, I am dying right now.
- 15 more minutes: Am I in labor?
- *watches an episode of I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant*
- me: Well fuck I guess I'm having a baby.
- *sobs for 20 minutes for no reason*
- *Scrolls through tumblr, sees a semi-funny post and laughs for 100 years*
- hours later after eating several chocolate bars, a bag of doritos, three lean cuisine pizzas and half a box of Cocoa Puffs...
- me: I may be wrong but, I think... I think that I may be going to start my period soon...
Was reading an article about a woman who was disemboweled in her sleep a couple of years ago
Mentioned that when she woke up, she first thought the pain was just her menstrual cramps.
I want to print this out and shove it in the face of the next douchebag who mocks me for taking pain meds for my vomit and faint inducing cramps.