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“There are going to be periods of loneliness, and everyone experiences them. Though the first response of those around us is often one of “oh, come on, you have so many friends,” there is no reason that we need to force that feeling of solitude away. There is strength and growth in loneliness, and it can often bring up the questions we are often afraid to look at head-on. Who are our real friends? What are we looking for when we go out? Are we ready to love other people? Do we even love ourselves? And what is often dismissively interpreted as moping can be quiet self-care, or the taking of a much-needed breather from forced socialization. Loneliness can and will be painful, but to pretend as though anyone who is truly healthy or happy doesn’t experience it is ludicrous. We live in a world which teaches us to always be happy, always be around our friends, always be looking for love, always triumphantly rising again when it fails us. But denying our periods of deep loneliness — or the ultimate aloneness that we face in life — doesn’t make us a more fulfilled human being. It doesn’t mean we have attained some higher plane of existence. It only means that we’re trying to cover a deep, complex wound that needs to bleed, and hurt, and even be temporarily ugly, if it’s ever going to heal.”

Chelsea Fagan
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